Re: sad and overwhelmed -- Unplanned Pregnancy Advice Board

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Subject:

Re: sad and overwhelmed

Author:
Shellie

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Date Posted: 11/ 7/08 7:20pm
In reply to: Nancy 's message, "sad and overwhelmed" on 11/ 6/08 10:35am

Hello Nancy,

First of all, what you�re feeling is normal. Please don�t feel like a bad mother for not being instantly happy about this pregnancy. But rest assured, your feelings will soon change! Give yourself time to work through your fears. Some people don't like the use of the word fear, but lets face it; it is scary to have your life go in a direction you didn't plan on! It's normal to think of all the negative aspects, like nighttime feedings and diaper changes. But once you begin to love this little one (and you will, LONG before the delivery) your focus will shift to the "good parts".

Give yourself time to adjust. And please do continue to post here--daily if you'd like. Use the forum like a journal, and we'll chime in and support you along the way!

Thanks for coming here and giving me the opportunity to offer my support.

Blessings,

Shellie

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Replies:

[> Subject: Re: sad and overwhelmed

Author:
mary f
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Date Posted: 11/10/08 5:17pm

if it makes you feel better...my maternal aunt and uncle adopted me when they were near 50 and i was 5 years old. my adoptive brothers and sisters were 12 -20 years older than me. i was the child closest to my dad emotionally and i believe having me kept him young. and guess who is the only person in our family who is close to my oldest brothers' kids? I am. my nieces and i went to europe together last summer. so my birth turned out to be a blessing for my parents and for my older brothers and sister.

13 years ago, my oldest brother and his wife who were 43 and 45 found out he was having a 4th child. my niece is absolutely the light of his life. it was not planned and the timing was not great but it really was the best thing that ever could have happened to my brother and his wife.

i think what you feel right now is normal...i do not think your age is as much of an issue as feeling that you have to start all over. age - we now live to be in our mid 80s on average. 43 isn't what it was a generation or two ago. we are very lucky in this regard.