| Subject: Re: Confused , upset , disappointed |
Author:
Pat
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Date Posted: 10/21/07 1:45pm
In reply to:
Kris
's message, "Re: Confused , upset , disappointed" on 10/19/07 5:19pm
Hi, Kris,
Congratulations, Mom! :)
Right now, you are not that much at risk. If he starts to do anything that you see as a warning, then you can act. You are carrying your baby all the time. So your baby is protected. Maybe there's a slight risk he'll just totally go after you, but I don't think so. That's not that common. So unless he has a history of violence, you should be OK. If he does, you might want to think about ending the relationship. But as long as he is being supportive, I don't see a real problem. If he continued to pressure you, I'd be much more concerned. Be aware, but try not to fret about it. Fears at this stage are normal; it's the hormone thing.
Make his current behavior a self-fulfilling prophecy. Take his word for it. Go get some help from a crisis pregnancy agency; talk to them, and let them help you through this. And as you plan, he will be more at ease. I'm sure he's worried about the future, how this baby will be provided for. I guess the real question now is whether he's feeling like a father, and whether he is prepared to fill that role. You can have some talks with him. Come at it from the direction of how he sees his role, what he is thinking he will do to support and interact with this child. He's past the initial shock, too. It's that initial panic that often makes people act like real jerks. You were also in a state of panic at the time, so you can understand.
Don't hesitate to come here and let us know how you are doing. It's not uncommon for a mother to come often, and to talk with us, and it is a good idea if you need it. Please keep in touch.
You're in our prayers.
Hugs,
Pat
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