Not good enough -- Lair of Flames

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Date Posted: 19:30:42 03/06/03 Thu
Author: Ana
Subject: Not good enough

Holding her fingernails lightly to her tight lips, Ana watches the last egg hatch. Two dragons! Maybe...no, they stagger and crawl towards the other two presences in the cave. First a flush of embarrassment crawls over the girl like a horde of insects. Everyone else who had journeyed here had Bonded. She had not. A small speck of loneliness, she watches the proceeding expressions of delirious joy crossing the faces of the new human-dragon pairs with mixed sadness and guilt. The sadness at her own exclusion, and the guilt at the seething black curtain of jealousy that pounds in wave after tireless wave at her defense.

Amidst that jealousy, a feeling of blatant and utter worthlessness is washed ashore on her mind, and her hands become two cold crabs that clutch at her clammy wrists with leftover abandoned hope. She just wasn't good enough, that was all. But next time....yes, she would return, if someday there was a clutch to return to. This wouldn't shake her, she was made of tougher stuff than that. But to do that, she'd have to look for a job, a steady place to build on until something else could happen. And maybe she'd see Marius again, but she had an odd feeling that at Orrin's hatching the path that she and her brother had since now traveled together was ripped violently in two, leaving her on one side and they on the other.

Voicing congratulations, however distracted and dry throated, she gives a final nod to Zypher before moving distractedly and quietly out of the cave, her steps a bit more leaden and with a more purposeful cadence than those of her entry. There was work to be done before she could show her homely face around dragon nests again.

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Replies:

A flurry of movement... -- Zypher~Ember, 13:49:46 03/07/03 Fri