| Subject: HA HA |
Author:
Sean
|
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Date Posted: 15:58:58 08/28/03 Thu
If you ever feel down, then get up, or read these.
>A Few Good Points
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>
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> When weeding, the best way to make sure you are
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> removing a weed, and not a valuable plant, is to pull on it.
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> If it comes out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant.
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> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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> The easiest way to find something lost around the
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> house is to buy a replacement.
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> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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> Never take life seriously.
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> Nobody gets out alive anyway.
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> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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> There are two kinds of pedestrians - the quick and
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> the dead.
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> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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> Life is sexually transmitted.
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> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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> An unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys.
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> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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> If quitters never win, and winners never quit, then who is
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> the fool who said, "Quit while you're ahead?"
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> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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> Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
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> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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> The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.
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> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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> Get the last word in: Apologize.
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> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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> Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day;
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> teach that person to use the Internet and they won't
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> bother you for weeks.
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> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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> Some people are like Slinkies . . .not really good for anything,
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> but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble
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> down the stairs.
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> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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> Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying
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> in hospitals dying of nothing.
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> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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> Have you noticed since everyone has a camcorder these days
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> no one talks about seeing UFOs like they use to.
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> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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> Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.
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> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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> All of us could take a lesson from the weather.
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> It pays no attention to criticism.
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> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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> In the 60s people took acid to make the world weird.
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> Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to
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> make it normal.
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> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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> Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession.
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> I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance
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> to the oldest profession.
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> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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> How is it one careless match can start a forest fire,
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> but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?
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> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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> AND THE # 1 THOUGHT FOR THE DAY:
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> You read about all these Terrorists - most of them
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> came here legally, but they hung around on these
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> expired visas, some for as long as 10-15 years.
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>
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> Now, compare that to Blockbuster; you are two days
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> late with a video and those people are all over you.
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> Let's put Blockbuster in charge of immigration!
>*************************************************The End
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