| Subject: Re: Anything in Little Rock or other parts of Arkansas? |
Author:
gail
|
[
Next Thread |
Previous Thread |
Next Message |
Previous Message
]
Date Posted: 05:57:59 10/11/04 Mon
In reply to:
David
's message, "Re: Anything in Little Rock or other parts of Arkansas?" on 14:24:23 03/25/04 Thu
Hi, my mom and brother are bp and I am looking for others in my area (around Fort Smith). I am 48 and although I knew we were a dysfunctional family, I didn't have a name for any of this until a few months ago. The behaviors I deal with the most are lies and exaggerations, raging, suicide threats, and guilt, guilt, guilt........ Let me know if there are others out there willing to meet to support each other.
Does any know of a support group in AR or the West
>Central part of AR. I have been reading Stop Walking
>on Eggshells and I Hate You, Don't leave me. This has
>been my marriage for 10 years. I didn't know others
>were experiencing the same thing. I just now am
>seeing reality.
>David
>
>
>>Hi there,
>>
>>I'm sorry to hear you're also (like me) involved with
>>a bpd. We got screwed! BIG TIME!
>>
>>My husband is a catholic clergy abuse victim from a
>>wealthy alcoholic, etc., family. Our first year of
>>courtship was
>>incredible - I truly believed I'd had the phenomonal
>>luck to finally meet Prince Charming. However - 3
>>weeks after our marriage - he began to convert into a
>>sorry mess of a human being.
>>
>>I first believed it must be because I was a terrible
>>wife - (totally my fault), then (after a year or two)
>>I believed that if I got him help for his abuse/family
>>issues, etc., he'd recover and I'd have my prince back
>>again. So - I led a campaign to the church, hired an
>>attorney and found him the best and most expensive
>>counselors in the country - we even moved to another
>>state to get away from all of his painful memories.
>>Afterall - standing by your husband is what good wives
>>do, right? WRONG!
>>
>>It's taken me 10 years of debilitating emotional abuse
>>and neglect (as well as $62,840.00 for counselors and
>>medication and treatments and books) to finally find a
>>psychiatrist who has diagnosed BPD. DUH!!! How come it
>>took so long??? So - now after this decade of raging
>>damage I'm now depressed (on prozac), no longer
>>interested in all the things I used to love, and I'm
>>completely hopeless about the future seeing as EVEN IN
>>THERAPY - he's still cycling through his "splitting",
>>"hoovering" and "crisis" about every 24-36 hours. I
>>know that sooner or later I will be so lost in this
>>mess I will truly be unable to do anything to protect
>>myself or get on with my life.
>>
>>In essence - through the years I've become his victim.
>>I used to be incredibly strong - very active -
>>contributing all over the place person. Now it's a
>>supreme effort to get up in the morning and get myself
>>to work. I'm truly losing it and am afraid that I'm no
>>longer capable of pulling myself out of this very deep
>>hole.
>>
>>I think I should leave for mental health sake - but I
>>have no energy or inclination to do so. Further - he's
>>constantly telling me "if you just believed in me THIS
>>time then I might be able to make a go of it, but if
>>you don't support me I won't be able to get better".
>>(This is after 10 years of lost jobs, outright lies,
>>financial ruin, broken dreams, rages, etc.) He's right
>>though - I don't believe a word he says - why would I?
>>Yet - he makes it my responsibiity to do so (or
>>"you're not doing what wives need to do for their
>>husband's").
>>
>>I have - in the past - bailed him out of everything,
>>paid the bills, kept my teaching job for 10 years and
>>remodeled the house - all while he was accessing gay
>>porno sites and telling me how "hurt" he was by his
>>childhood traumas. Isn't there a point where a wife no
>>longer has to tolerate this crazy behavior?
>>(Rhetorical question). I'm on my second marriage and I
>>really wanted this to work. I don't want to fail in
>>another relationship, nor do I want the guilt
>>associated with leaving a very sick person. Does
>>anyone in Arkansas relate to what I'm writing here?
>>
>>I know he's wrong and sick and lost - yet - I'm still
>>here treading water in a shark tank. I need some help
>>from real live people who understand the psychology
>>behind this terrible disease called "BPD".
>>
>>I've read Walking on Eggshells and am in the middle of
>>the workbook. This is now creating more problems
>>because I no longer listen to his 'cons' and he can't
>>manipulate me as much as he used to. So now - He's
>>REALLY mad most of the time. I'm afraid and ashamed
>>most of the time, but, I'm beginning to actually
>>beieve that maybe life without him wouldn't be so bad
>>afterall. At least I'd sleep at night instead of
>>listen to him talk about his anger and fear. Do they
>>EVER give it up and get on with life? I think not!!!
>>
>>If anyone is interested in conversing - please write
>>back. I'd truly appreciate your input.
>>
>>Thanks so much. Lisa
>>
>>
>>
>>>>I just realized that my boyfriend has BPD. He had me
>>>>believing that I was at fault for everything. If you
>>>>know of anything remotely near me, please send an
>>>>email message to me. Thank you!!
>>>
>>>I just got to this website now. I've had xbpgf and
>>>she is continuing to hoover me. I am in central
>>>Arkansas. Please contact me. I had no idea there
>>>were others in Arkansas. But then again, now it
>>>doesn't surprise me.
>>>
>>>I hope to hear from you.
[
Next Thread |
Previous Thread |
Next Message |
Previous Message
]
| |
Feedback: 