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Date Posted: 07:28:34 05/08/16 Sun
Author: Rachael (Investigation concluded ?)
Subject: Re: Any input? My story is sad.
In reply to: LostGirl 's message, "Any input? My story is sad." on 03:19:10 05/05/16 Thu

Correct me if I am wrong, but it sounds like child services and law enforcement did respond, but due to your daughter's level of disability they were unable to get a disclosure from her. Without a definitive disclosure they do not want to seek a forensic exam for her due to the trauma of the exam perhaps coupled with her disability. Some questions and suggestions -

- was a forensic interview conducted on your daughter by a trained specialist in child interviewing? This could have even been the detective as they can also be trained in these types of interviews.

- was a pre-text telephone call conducted between you and your ex to attempt to obtain statements from him?

- you said your daughter makes comments or some levels of disclosure to you, keep a digital recorder on hand to attempt to record these statements for evidentiary purposes,

- when you go to court regarding protecting your three-year-old you will need factual data. Gather all of the disclosure information, reactions, etc. Use this during your hearing - not emotions regarding what you feel happened,

I know it is very, very frightening. But understand what it would be like if he made an allegation against you and it could not be supported by evidence - but your daughter was still taken away from you. It isn't so much that the system is broken, it's that people are broken, because child abuse is insidious. it is scary as hell for anyone's children to be away from them even when you're pretty confident they are safe. We want them right here so we KNOW they are safe. But to have them in an environment where you strongly believe they are at risk....you move the world to protect them.

I agree that speaking with your daughter's physician is a great idea. But their mandated reporter status is moot. The abuse has already been reported. If it is reported again - unless there is new evidence - it will be referred to the closed or suspended case.

Is your daughter seeing a psychologist who specializes in sexual abuse of disabled children? Couldn't hurt. Such a psychologist mat be able to advise regarding communication improvements for disclosures regarding your daughter.

Have one notebook or note section on your phone where you document everything suspicious or concerning. You may gather a lot if information that still may not be viable in court, but then you just might find the one that is viable. Feelings and beliefs, while strong, are not enough. Pretty telephone calls are great because lack of denials are also important. (Check recording laws in your system. Often you cannot record without consent - which kind of defeats the purpose - or with the aid of law enforcement or divorce agreements that allow recordings.)

I wish you all the best. If you have any questions about why something was or wasn't done or next steps, please ask. I am in law enforcement and specialize in this area.

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