| Subject: Torn |
Author:
Distant Echo
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Date Posted: 17:40:27 11/06/02 Wed
In reply to:
Whirlwind
's message, "Re: Explore" on 14:45:32 11/06/02 Wed
Suddenly, her stomach lurched, and her eyes sharpened, then dulled, blurring her sight. What had she done? She had left Whirlwind, her only friend. And yet she knew she had to do it. There was a deep pain in her, a longing, a fear. And yet, she felt somehow a grim freedom leap up within her wounded heart. She knew that the freedom would someday overpower the hurt, but she would never forget Whirlwind, or the days she was a beta, a truly accepted member in the pack. Her regal tail dropped, and her head bowed, unable to withstand the pressure of the wind pushing against it. She felt as if she had betrayed herself, her pack, her friend, her alpha. And yet, at the same time, she felt as if she had done the right thing.
She was not meant to be a Beta.
She had seen in Whirlwind's eyes the knowledge that she wouldn't come back.If only Whirlwind hadn't known, she could have kept up her hope...But no, there was no way to stay a pack member.
She walked slowly, deliberately, through the grass that had sprung up thickly in the summer over Whisper Hollow. She breathed in the fresh air, and for the first time it's scent was slightly bitter, for she knew she would never again smell it from within the pack land.
What had she done?
But she couldn't turn back, and so walked on. She felt the soft earth beneath her now-heavy, lingering paws, knowing it was the last time she was feel the way summer affected the earth in Whisper Hollow. Finally, she came to the edge of the pack lands.
She turned back for a moment, looking for Whirlwind, almost hoping that she would catch her eye and tell her to come back, she wasn't allowed to go.
But when Whirlwind did not turn, she let out a mournful howl, telling the world of her good-bye to the Whisper Hollow pack. She turned, and as her last paw left the ground of Whisper Hollow territory and landed on the loners territory, she heard the closing of a great gate in her mind. She knew she could never open it again.
But in her heart was a grim happiness, a small seed that had fallen onto the earth. She pushed it under the ground with her paw, and stood aside, to let her shadow not be on the seed so the sun could fall upon it. She would nourish it and help it to grow into a beautiful plant, she knew not yet what kind.
But it was a plant with possibilities, one of them joy.
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