Re: Goals -- The Padded Room

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Subject: Re: Goals

Author:
Rogue

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Date Posted: 26/07/04 3:56pm
In reply to: Strega 's message, "Goals" on 23/07/04 5:01am

I believed from a young age that I was going to die young. I don't know where the notion came from - was just that gut feeling and I had it since I could remember.

With that, I was never expected to be anything. My brother was the star, and I was just.....Jessie. The flake who would never be anything of importance. No one ever had expectations of me, so it was hard to have expectations of myself.

So, needless to say, goals aren't something I ever bothered with. Dreams, yes, but actual goals were laughable. And often laughed at.

When I didn't die in that car accident, which by all rights, I should have, it flipped everything upside down. And still I wonder if I cheated fate and I'm living on borrowed time.

So, goals are still something I don't bother with. I can't see happy-ever-after for me, so it's easier on myself not to want something I can't have. I'm not masochistic enough to torment myself like that.

I have a good car with only two years left on the loan. I have the skills to get work pretty much anywhere. I live at home, so my living costs are irrelevant. I'd like a puppy at some point, and I've already a holiday in the works. I'm not unhappy. I know how to dream without fixating on those dreams enough that they hurt when they don't happen. What more is there?

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Replies:

Subject	Author	Date
Odd.....	Rogue	2/08/04 7:16pm