He rested his head back against the wall as he watched the run rise slowly, it seemed like the lull of nothingness after a long and raging storm. He felt numb and empty and helpless and he didn;t know what to do or what to say. He didn;t know what to do next... how do you carry on after something like this? How do you start over? "What happens now?" He murmered quietly. He knew what technically happened now... paper work and counselling and the funeral... but then what? There seemed to be nothing left. He missed her already, and he knew neither him or Ash would ever be the same again. He wound his arms tight around her and burried his face in her soft hair, swallowing heavily as he just concentrated on breathing. -- Marcus' Apatment

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Date Posted: 11:10:35 08/17/06 Thu
Author: Marc
Subject: He rested his head back against the wall as he watched the run rise slowly, it seemed like the lull of nothingness after a long and raging storm. He felt numb and empty and helpless and he didn;t know what to do or what to say. He didn;t know what to do next... how do you carry on after something like this? How do you start over? "What happens now?" He murmered quietly. He knew what technically happened now... paper work and counselling and the funeral... but then what? There seemed to be nothing left. He missed her already, and he knew neither him or Ash would ever be the same again. He wound his arms tight around her and burried his face in her soft hair, swallowing heavily as he just concentrated on breathing.
In reply to: Ashley 's message, "So hate me today
Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you " on 15:27:35 08/16/06 Wed

>She had gotten the news five hours ago but she had
>been driving when she got the call on her cell phone
>and had to pull over. It taken her almost two hours to
>just be able to drive again and then she'd had to go
>to the hospital to sign some papers and talk to the
>doctors and she had been told by Brandy that Marc had
>left without saying a word to anyone as soon as they
>were told. It had scared her, thinking he was out
>there as emotional as he was so she had driven around
>for awhile to all his old haunts and whatnot, just to
>make sure he wasn't there before she finally came to
>his apartment. She hadn't been there since the night
>she left but she just didn't think she could face
>going home to where all of Jessie's things were, her
>room, her toys, all the pictures she had colored,
>everything...she needed to be with Marc. She could
>hardly breathe still, her hands were shaking, her eyes
>were red and swollen and she couldn't even get the key
>in the door till the second try and only then was she
>able to push the door open to reveal that the
>apartment was completely dark. Stepping in, she
>dropped the keys carelessly to the floor and closed
>the door, blocking out the little bit of light that
>had been flooding in. "Marc?" She called out, her
>voice shaky and hesitant. She felt like her body was
>going to stop working for her any second.

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Replies:

"I don't know..." She spoke honestly, her eyes closed as she let out a soft breath. "She was...she was all I had.." After her and Marc split her world really did revolve around the little girl, the only one she had here. She had come back to RD to look for him but other than him...her family didn't live here anymore, her friends had all moved away or had lives of their own that they were busy with, she really had no one else and she was suddenly at a complete and total loss. She bit her lip heavily, tucking her head against his chest beneath his chin as she took a few ragged breath. Her throat and chest hurt from crying, her head was pounding and her body ached from being on the floor for hours but none of it matter, none of her own discomfort mattered because her baby was gone. (NT) -- Ash, 11:15:30 08/17/06 Thu