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Date Posted: 23:39:22 04/25/06 Tue
Author: Kyrian
Subject: Inside
In reply to: Haylie 's message, "inside" on 23:26:10 04/25/06 Tue

(He smiled sheepishly at her comment about his lack of relationship experience.) Yeah..well maybe you'll understand why I panicked when I realized I love you and then thought you might be transferred away from me. I just acted on impulse. (He looked down at his hands, hanging between his knees.) I wish we could just go back to the way it was.. before I asked you to marry me and fucked everything up. (He lived with the guilt of it every day, it drove him insane inside to know that he had been the one to open her up to her passionate side and then to dash it down just as quick. He could see from the way she was shyly holding herself back that he had dashed her innocent feelings about marraige.. perhaps he would never get her trust back.) I am just getting really sick of reliving what I did every day, Haylie. I want to start over with you, to have a chance to court you the right way.. but I will be damned if I will keep pussyfooting around and wondering what is going on between us. (He had lifted his head and was gazing at her through thoughtful eyes, the sort of look he often had had with her when they had worked together.. the focused and determined expression he got when he was in something for the long haul and wasnt about to be argued with or talked out of his thoughts.)

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