To clarify -- RSQUBF discussion forum

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Date Posted: 07:14:58 12/21/04 Tue
Author: Mike K.
Subject: To clarify
In reply to: Mike K. 's message, "Even for those..." on 07:03:07 12/21/04 Tue

Much later, it became clear to me that my Christian life in UBF left no place for romance (even for romance with Christ... the sweetest love relationship anyone can ever have) but that anything romantic was to be considered ugly in UBF.

I want to comment a bit more on this statement:
on the one hand, UBF sogams from married shepherds are very often filled with praiseology over the oh-so-perfect, oh-so-loving Korean wives, and this can be (mis)understood by many "sheep" in the sogam sessions to be reflections on the deep love going on in these marriages.

Yes, men who are in love like to praise their wives. I, too, would speak only in the best words about my wife (because I love her). But note that the sogams contain nothing personal, only "great coworker, so ascrificial, so diligent and so hardworking" and phrases like that? I wouldn't speak like that of my wife (even though I believe these things also characterize her quite well) because it would sound artificial. And yes, in UBF that usually is. You say that as a token praise, not as heartfelt emotion as a UBF shepherd, because if you do not...

I haven't heard much about romance in UBF relationships. Much rather, I've heard the stories of "it isn't always easy but we can bear with one another". The glue that sticks a UBF couple together is repression and fear (of the UBFdirector, of divorce, of many things) not love and care.
Usually, when love and genuine care set in, the chapter directors order some "training" to make sure the flaring romance is squelched, they very well know that love gives people strength to overcome adversity... but the cold, sterile atmosphere of the UBF keeps people intimidated and incapable of fighting this incredible emotional abuse.

I would also undersign: sexuality isn't inherently sinful.
It can be out of control or even under Satan's control, but inherently, God created us as man and woman... guess why? Because it was well-pleasing to Him.
Don't call things well-pleasing to God ugly, that's an affront to God the Most High.

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