a brief return -- Crickets Journal

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Subject: a brief return

Author:
Cricket

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Date Posted: 02:59:36 05/16/02 Thu

I cant remember the last few days.
They had to pull Trevor from my arms.
I received a missive from Indigo..and that bastard abandoned her.
I returned, yesterday..and last night ended his life. It was my suprise that it was in a place where I saw a familiar face. Dayna. Gods it has been years since Ive seen her..and she is no longer the timid little slave. She is quite powerful now, in her guild.
Im sure that after his murder..they will find some way of resurrecting the little weasel. Not that I think tis worth the effort..but he will walk again.
Ill find someone that will remove his head for him the next time.
Regardless..here I find myself back in the realm..and still with the same problem..to find a home for Indigo. I think I may say to hell with it..and just take her and I on back to the cabin. I dont know yet. I am not even able to be around Indigo right now. I have a rage in me that was unsated by spilling Castalanes blood. It would take much more.
I dream at night, of Ciro. I wake each time, hating him all the more. I hate him for what he's done to me..I hate him for dropping out of my life once again. ..and I hate him for the weariness I feel.
Indigo is safe enough...working at the medieval..and the camera is there should she need a safe place for the night. Even the roost is there..but she says she will not go there, for Safiya is rarely about, and it brings back too many memories. I understand just how she feels.
Days go by..that I cannot remember..that I know not what I do, or where I go. I awake with blood on my hands, and a throbbing in my head..and I dont know what Ive done.
I dont really care.
I long for death..yet I fear the outcome of such. My soul is not my own.
~C~

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