Re: Scared and Alone -- Unplanned Pregnancy Advice Board

[ Show ]

Support VoyForums

[ Shrink ]

VoyForums Announcement: Programming and providing support for this service has been a labor of love since 1997. We are one of the few services online who values our users' privacy, and have never sold your information. We have even fought hard to defend your privacy in legal cases; however, we've done it with almost no financial support -- paying out of pocket to continue providing the service. Due to the issues imposed on us by advertisers, we also stopped hosting most ads on the forums many years ago. We hope you appreciate our efforts.

Show your support by donating any amount. (Note: We are still technically a for-profit company, so your contribution is not tax-deductible.) PayPal Acct: Feedback:

Donate to VoyForums (PayPal):

Wednesday, April 15, 12:42:28

[ Login ] [ Main index ] [ Post a new message ] [ Search | Check update time | Archives: 1, 2, 3, [4], 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10 ]

Subject:

Re: Scared and Alone

Author:
Shellie

[ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]

Date Posted: 11/19/08 2:55pm
In reply to: Jennifer 's message, "Scared and Alone" on 11/19/08 7:54am

Hi Jennifer,

Thanks so much for posting here. I'm sorry to hear that you're with a man who does not love you. If this man is not willing to commit to you and love his child, perhaps it's time to move on. We all deserve to be loved. I know this advice is not going to make you feel good. No one wants to leave someone they love, and the idea of raising a child alone is just plain scary. However, you can never make someone love you. If this man is willing to give you up if you have his baby, then he's not worth having and would eventually leave you, anyway.

Being a single mother isn't easy, but it is doable. There are many programs out there that will help you. Please visit your local pregnancy resource center. They will refer you to any resources you can benefit from. And keep in mind that there is a man out there who will love you AND your child! And you and your child deserve that kind of man!

Having an abortion isn't a simple thing that is over when the surgery is over. It's a lifetime of knowing that you ended you're child's existence. There is pain, guilt, and many times regret involved. If you stay with your boyfriend and abort your pregnancy to keep him, it's likely you'll resent him. And when he finally moves on from a woman he doesn't love, how will you feel? I want to urge you to not abort in order to keep this man. A man who loves you will stay even through an unplanned pregnancy. A man who doesn't love you will eventually leave, no matter what. This is your baby; I hope you welcome him or her into your life.

It's okay to not be overjoyed. It's normal to not want an unplanned pregnancy at first. It's normal to be overwhelmed with worry about how you will make it. I've been through this; I know how scary it is. You're stronger than you think. You can do it.

This will be the true test about your boyfriend's love for you. Tell him about the pregnancy. Then give him time to absorb the news before you take what he says to heart. He will most likely not be happy at first. That is just normal. However, if after some time he tells you to abort I hope you don't take his advice. Where will this man be 10 years from now when you're still regretting the abortion you had? Most likely he'll be raising a child with some other woman, and you'll be mourning the death of yours.

Stay strong. Please post often. We are here for you.

Hugs,

Shellie

[ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]