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Wednesday, April 15, 12:42:10Login ] [ Main index ] [ Post a new message ] [ Search | Check update time | Archives: 12345[6]78910 ]
Subject: Re: Couldn't have - Can't have


Author:
Sharon
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Date Posted: 09/11/07 10:16am
In reply to: Tara 's message, "Couldn't have - Can't have" on 09/11/07 3:15am

Tara,

This baby is here for a reason, I'm sure of that... The odds are SO remote that he or she would be here, but here she is (or he ;-)

I had a friend who developed a condition where they had to do surgery. She did not KNOW she was pregnant at the time. She was in the very early stages and the surgery was in the abdominal region and SHOULD have, by all accounts, disrupted the pregnancy. But, a few weeks later, she found that she was pregnant - and had been pregnant at the time of the surgery! The doctors were amazed that she was still pregnant, given the surgery, but she was. She carried the baby to term and now has a beautiful 18-year-old daugther.

I've also know of people who were told that their medications COULD cause birth defects, but had babies that were born perfectly normal. So, just because a medicine CAN cause a problem doesn't mean it WILL cause a problem. So, you could end up having an abortion and then finding out that the baby you aborted was normal. Plus, we are all defective in some way - it's just some of our defects are more obvious than others ;-)

Now, it could be that the chemotherapy will have a detrimental effect on your developing baby, but you could certainly let nature take its course in taht case and allow your child to have the only life it can have - in your womb.

I will say a prayer for you. This has got to be such a hard situation to do through!

Sharon

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Replies:
[> Subject: Re: Couldn't have - Can't have


Author:
Pat
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Date Posted: 09/11/07 2:05pm

Hi, Tara,

I am so glad you came!

(We can't know God's purpose for giving you a child now, but for all we know, this could be the child who will take care of you later in life.)

I will give you a few facts that you may find helpful. Since you were taking all these meds at the time you became pregnant, the most likely things that will happen are, your baby won't make it at all, or s/he will be healthy. The reason is that the defects that could occur at this very early stage are usually so severe that the baby won't even survive. But you can give your child a chance at life. I know of many cases where the baby was fine, and it was a real miracle from a medical standpoint. If God has a purpose for your baby beyond birth, He will protect him or her.

The second thing I should tell you is that there is a treatment for Methotrexate. Methotrexate works by causing the mother's body to stop producing progesterone. But I know of at least one case where a woman had Methotrexate and changed her mind, and the doctor gave her progesterone shots throughout her pregnancy, and her baby was born normal. There is some risk involved, but the question is whether a mother is willing to undergo some risk to save her baby.

The third thing I want to mention is that someone close to me has rheumatoid arthritis. I am assuming that when you say "rheumatoid disease" this is what you mean. If not, what I will tell you may not be relevant. However, this person is using natural remedies for his rheumatoid arthritis. He is taking a supplement now called Ultra Joint Jolt. It's put out by Real Advantage. Google the name, and you will find that Real Advantage is the first link listed. In addition, he takes two aspirin at night (he probably wouldn't have to take any, since he went one night without, and had no pain). Do some research into alternative remedies, and you may well find something that will work for you. Those drugs you are currently taking aren't good for you, anyway.

Go to a doctor who is willing to treat you both. You can get a name from your local crisis pregnancy agency. A different doctor might tell you not to try the progesterone, but you really need someone who is willing to help both of you, and won't overlook the needs of your child. Such a doctor can be trusted to make better medical decisions as well, because a willingness to neglect one patient for the sake of the other is a violation of medical ethics, and a person who is willing to violate medical ethics cannot be trusted to make good medical decisions. I know this from PERSONAL experience.

Here is a link to find a local crisis pregnancy agency: www.pregnancycenters.org

Good luck with this. We will be praying for you.

Hugs,
Pat
[> [> Subject: Re: Couldn't have - Can't have


Author:
Tara
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Date Posted: 09/12/07 3:50am

Dear Pat,

Thanks for your reply ( and everyone elses, too!)

Yes I was specific when I said "Rheumatoid disease". Not many people know this, I certainly didn't til I was diagnosed - but it's not always just "arthritis".
It's actually a systemic disease, it's pathology can be very similar to lupus - as in my case. It can affect any of the organs, as well as the joints causing excruciating pain and disability.
I know the drugs aren't good for me - but I promise you, the alternative has been far worse. I now have some movement again, and thus far have been willing to suffer through the side effects to hopefully put this disease into remission - the goal of the chemo. I will never be cured, but am willing to fight.

I visited my Doctor today and told him about the pregnancy. He told me to immediately stop taking the new chemo drug (lufluonimide) and has given me some form of powder to take over the next 8 days to flush my system of methotrexate. (Sorry! I don't have the prescription right here so I don't know the name)
He says when I visit my GP on Friday to book an ultrasound to see if the baby is in fact alive - so it sounds as though you are right, Pat, with regards to the baby being definitively one or the other. (Viable or not). However, as in all methotrexate literature, it warns of severe defects to the fetus)

I have been on a very strong dose of methotrexate for just on one year, so I would think my chances are slim.

However, I am feeling much better today as I finally managed to get some proper sleep after 4 days.

Thank you all for your kind thoughts and wishes. This has really helped.

~Tara



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