Author:
Jesus of Nazereth
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Date Posted: 12/15/04 8:05pm
In reply to:
Erwin Rommel and the Ohio Players
's message, "Fan Appreciation Day!" on 12/15/04 7:41pm
"nuts just itching to play"
"nuts unload all they have on opponent"
"nuts have blueballs, out of pennant race"
"nuts take an incredible pounding by beavers"
Grandma just loves to go to the game because she sits so close to the field and those loveable sweaty nuts are right in her face, you should see her smile when the nuts swing right under her nose.
MODESTO---WHAT A BUNCH OF COMPLETE FUCKING IDIOTS
That's right! Come on down and hang with Modesto's
>Nuts! Kids get in free and get free autographs from a
>handfull of Nuts.
>
>
>
>
>>I am fucking speechless. what dank, crank addled crack
>>of the central valley's ass does this majority of
>>voters live in? what, was this some kind of christmas
>>present to keyes? "here you go, festus, y'all get vote
>>on the new baseball thingamajigger's name. have
>>everyone in.......um.......town(?) vote for the body
>>part that they like best; and remember, the descending
>>colon is NOT the roller coaster that they're building
>>in the back of the gallo art center. and don't fuck
>>this up like you guys did on the whole
>>reproduction/gene pool thing." and they picked the
>>NUTS. just fucking speechless.
>>
>>>I see. I like how the logo is two nuts.
>>>
>>>> www.modestonuts.com
>>>> whatashittyasstown
>>>> withstupidpeople
>>>>
>>>>>My God. I just did extensive research to confirm
>>>your
>>>>>story, and goddammit you're right. The Modesto
>>Nuts.
>>>>>
>>>>>The Modesto Nuts.
>>>>>
>>>>>Nope, it doesn't grow on you.
>>>>>
>>>>>The Modesto Nuts
>>>>>
>>>>>Doesn't get better with time.
>>>>>
>>>>>If you go to the modesto bee online poll, it looks
>>>>>like 52% of the voters didn't want any of
>"finalist"
>>>>>names. Nuts wins with 18% of the popular vote.
>>>>>
>>>>>Fucking awesome!
>>>>>
>>>>>>For those that don't know, Modesto has a single A
>>>>>>minor league baseball team. Formerly known as the
>>>>>>Modesto Athletics. Oakland pulled their minor
>>league
>>>>>>team out of Modesto for a number of reasons
>(mainly
>>>>>>because it's a penny-pinching shithole), but we
>are
>>>>>>going to have another minor league team. What
>>better
>>>>>>way to name a new team than to have the general
>>>>>>population decide through a contest. There were 5
>>>>>>finalists (funny, I never got a ballot). And the
>>>>>>winner is........................The Modesto
>Nuts.
>>>>>> I just changed my major to journalism so
>that
>>>I
>>>>>>can go work for the Modesto Bee sports section. I
>>>can
>>>>>>already read the headlines:
>>>>>>
>>>>>>"Stockton Ports crush Modesto Nuts"
>>>>>>
>>>>>>"Nuts hanging by a string in playoff hunt"
>>>>>>
>>>>>>"Nuts show guts: pull out victorious"
>>>>>>
>>>>>>"Nuts hanging in there after defeat"
>>>>>>
>>>>>>"Modesto Nuts hope to make big splash in playoffs"
>>>>>>
>>>>>>"Sacramento Rivercats clip Nuts in upset"
>>>>>>
>>>>>>"Nuts on a roll with help from big stick"
>>>>>>
>>>>>>"Modesto Nuts top latest poll"
>>>>>>
>>>>>>"Nuts come home bruised and battered from
>roadtrip"
>>>>>>
>>>>>>"Modesto Nuts hit Stockton Ports Hard"
>>>>>>
>>>>>>"Nuts stink: lose twentieth straight game"
>>>>>>
>>>>>>"Nuts swollen with pride after playoff victory"
>>>>>>
>>>>>>I just hope they have a team slogan contest as
>well
>>>>so
>>>>>>I can submit my entry:
>>>>>>
>>>>>>"Modesto Nuts: just inches away from being
>>assholes"
>>>>>>
>>>>>>So what could be worse than the Modesto Nuts? It
>>>>isn't
>>>>>>worse as much as it is equally horrible. But one
>of
>>>>>>the other five finalists was, I shit you not, The
>>>>>>Modesto Slayers. At least we could have had
>>multiple
>>>>>>mascots. Big furry models of Condit and Peterson
>>>>>>running around John Thurman Field pumping up the
>>>>>>crowd. Modestans are fucking brilliant.
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