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Date Posted: 22:51:36 08/15/01 Wed
Author: james
Subject: I like the contrast of the colours and shades. I also think that the last line only helps to emphasise the incompatability of the characters. I have to admit that the soft thing is a little overused.
In reply to: zeina 's message, "i thought i'd decapitalise this one. suits it more i think..... i really ought to get over beaches and moon light though...." on 12:13:08 06/17/01 Sun


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[> Mostly I don't like this. The whole poem seems too easily summarised by the first line. 'Darkened in the centre' has similar effect (on me) to 'salty residue', too precise perhaps. In the third stanza she sounds very carried away, like she's drunk or having a breakdown of some kind. This is interesting in the way it succeeds more in describing the narrator than in describing the other person. I'm left wondering about the mental state of someone who thinks of their eyes as fuchsia. -- luke, 18:40:14 08/21/01 Tue

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