Q3) I think Pamela's heart and head have been in conflict since she first fell in love with Casey. On the surface, Jamie would be much better than Casey, the IRA member, in her life. But when you dig deeper, I think Casey is the best man for Pamela. Jamie would have protected her and "saved" her all her life. With Casey, she's grown even stronger and more capable, she's had to face some pretty rough truths and come to terms with them and has grown as a person as a result. In this particular scene, she wants to be mad at him, wants to resent him for the pain he's put her through but she can't. She simply loves him too much. And I think part of her head knows that she's in for in no matter what she does. If she stays with Casey, life will never be simple or easy and she'll always wonder if he'll come home that night. If she left him, she'd still be wondering and worrying about him, that kind of love can't be shut off like a tap, nor ever truly erased from your heart. -- Cindy's Cottage

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Date Posted: 17:59:16 10/09/07 Tue
Author: Carla
Subject: Q3) I think Pamela's heart and head have been in conflict since she first fell in love with Casey. On the surface, Jamie would be much better than Casey, the IRA member, in her life. But when you dig deeper, I think Casey is the best man for Pamela. Jamie would have protected her and "saved" her all her life. With Casey, she's grown even stronger and more capable, she's had to face some pretty rough truths and come to terms with them and has grown as a person as a result. In this particular scene, she wants to be mad at him, wants to resent him for the pain he's put her through but she can't. She simply loves him too much. And I think part of her head knows that she's in for in no matter what she does. If she stays with Casey, life will never be simple or easy and she'll always wonder if he'll come home that night. If she left him, she'd still be wondering and worrying about him, that kind of love can't be shut off like a tap, nor ever truly erased from your heart.
In reply to: Tracy 's message, "Mermaid in a Bowl of Tears ~ Part 5 ~ An Aran Idyll" on 06:13:33 10/09/07 Tue

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I've seriously been thinking about these questions all day (great questions Tracy and deep :-) but was unable to come up with anything in reply that made sense. Your comment 'she wants to be mad at him, wants to resent him' struck a chord with me. Each time I've read this book, I've wondered - why the hell is she so mad at him? It's not like he went out and got lifted on purpose. I understand her anger with him about not visiting in prison and I think I've come to some kind of understanding overall...but I'd like to hear y'all thoughts on this. I can think of times I get mad at Glenn and it's through no fault of his own...but it seems selfish after the fact and I feel bad. (NT) -- Marilyn, 20:01:00 10/09/07 Tue
- I went through a period of total irrational anger with Pat, that I'll relay some other time, but it came close to really doing bad things to our relationship. It's not uncommon to be angry when they're away for a long stretch, whether it was by choice or not. Pat and I have found the longer we're apart the worse we get along too. Here she's mad because she didn't know if he was dead or alive for two full weeks. (NT) -- celtgirl in Vancouver, 20:48:20 10/09/07 Tue
  - Anger is a way to vent one's emotions, even if it is an inappropriate response for a situation, but it's better than blowing one's top! CINDY, did you see our pleading messages on the pub for you to please come visit us at the Sheraton on the 18th. You're probably spending the night in Vancouver again, so come see us - please! (NT) -- Denise, 21:16:05 10/09/07 Tue
  - Good to see ya in Vancouver girl :-) Safe and uneventful travel to 'The Happiest Place on Earth' today :-) (NT) -- Marilyn, 06:43:29 10/10/07 Wed
- As Cindy said, it's not a rational anger, but, as Denise said, it's a way to vent pent-up emotions. My mom, who worked for many years as a paediatirc emergency nurse says many parents were often furious at their children for getting badly hurt. It's a reaction to fear and worry in some people. Most strong emotions have no basis in reality or logical reason behind them. (NT) -- Carla, 05:26:15 10/10/07 Wed
  - Thanks y'all :-) This is kind of what I figured out in my mind yesterday. That sometimes when there are just so many other strong emotions rollin' around inside you - it tends to come out as anger. I remembered my Grandmother got really p/o'd at my Grandfather for dying and leaving her alone. At the time I was like 'how the hell is she gonna be mad at a dead man'. Like I said, every read has left me wondering why Pamela had so much anger but I never took the time to try and figure it out - and that's one of the GREAT things about discussing the book here :-) (NT) -- Marilyn, 06:21:59 10/10/07 Wed
    - I do have to say that I agree with you Marilyn; she knew what he was when she married him and she asked to marry him so in many ways, she can't be angry at him for that and he certainly tried harder to stay out of trouble in this book then he did in EU, but as the others have said, anger isn't always rational- she's afraid for him and that makes her angry. He can't help that unless he can make her stop loving him. (NT) -- susiej, 10:49:21 10/10/07 Wed

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