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>The holidays are coming up which means our kid’s >schedules are going to be busy with holiday parties, >travel and other activities. This means late nights, >early morning, lots of sugar and stimulation. I >don’t need to tell any parents that all this leads >to temper tantrums, disobedience, and poor behavior. > >I’ve written here and on other boards about our >family’s use of first time obedience (FTO). I >won’t rehash all the rules but in a nutshell the >boys are required to say, “yes mommy/daddy” when >their name is called and immediately come to us. They >are expected to maintain eye contact and smile while >being given commands then immediately follow the >orders with a happy heart. Our 10 year old son has >been given the privilege to appeal an order because he >has been FTO for over a year. To appeal he must wait >until we are done talking then ask, “may I >appeal?” If we grant permission then he states his >appeal and we either accept it or not. The 5&7 year >olds are not allowed to appeal yet. > >Here’s an example of how an appeal may work: >Me: Henry! >Henry: yes mommy! (He immediately comes to me) >Me: it’s bedtime. Please get ready for bed and wait >for me to tuck you in. (He maintains eye contact and >smiles during this) >Henry: may I please appeal? >Me: yes >Henry: the baseball game on TV is almost over, it’s >not a school night and I got an A on my math test. May >I stay up until the end of the game? >Me: granted but it’s off to bed afterwards. > >Pretty simple. Again, the 5&7 year olds are never >allowed to appeal like that, it’s an earned >privilege. > >Over the last few weeks 10 has been slipping on the >FTO. Last week my husband and I revoked his privilege >to appeal. With the chaos of the holidays coming up I >wanted to put 10&7 through a training session or boot >camp. > >You may be wondering why not 5 too? Why only do the >training for 10&7? A 5 year old is still at the >beginning stages of child training and FTO. Everyday >is a training day for him. We “tomato stake” him >everyday. > >This weekend was a rare weekend. We didn’t have any >plans; no soccer, Boy Scouts, church functions, family >gatherings etc. So this weekend was a child training >weekend. > >On Friday, while the boys were at school, I prepared. >I bought a large box of Huggies Little Movers size 7 >for the 7 year old, and a large box of Goodnites >medium for the 10 year. I laid out on the family room >coffee table a copy of the household rules, a >hairbrush size plastic paddle, a couple of >children’s obedience books, tissues, their diapers >and of course the Bible. In the upstairs kids bathroom >I prepared an enema and put the toddler seat on the >toilet (it has handles and a little pee guard in the >front of the seat for boys). Lastly I arranged with my >parents for the 5 year old to stay at their place. > >When the boys came home from school we sat on the >couch together and reviewed the rules, read the >obedience books and a few bible passages, and talked. >I then undressed 10 and stationed him in the corner. > >I took 7 up to the bathroom and undressed him too. I >administered the enema and had him sit on the toddler >seat on the toilet. I then went back to the family >room, sat on the couch and called 10 over. I placed >him over my lap. I spent about a minute hand spanking >him. Then 5 minutes with the paddle. He was through >the roof in pain and his little butt was as red as a >stop sign. I gave him a break before doing a second 3 >minute round including hand spanking the thighs. I >cleaned up his face then put him back in the corner. > >I then went back upstairs to check on 7 and was hit by >the smell when I entered the bathroom. The enema did >its job! I cleaned him up and took him back to the >family room. He’s too young and small for the >plastic paddle, so I just used my hand for several >minutes. His spanking wasn’t as hard as big >brother’s because he had the enema and is being DD. >After I put him in his diaper and placed him in the >corner. > >By this time 10 was finishing his corner time. I >called him over and put the Goodnite on. I explained >he doesn’t have to use it but will need to wear and >ask permission to use the bathroom. I then took him to >the kitchen for a snack of carrot sticks and milk. >When 7 was done with his corner time he joined 10 at >the kitchen table for a snack too, but got a baby >bottle of milk. > >Over the weekend we played obedience games, and did >chores. They wore only their diapers and white socks. >They had to ask permission for EVERYTHING and had no >privacy. Their bedtime was 7 pm. We did little “warm >ups” here and there. But overall they did great! If >10 keeps it up then we’ll restore his privilege to >appeal next week.

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