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Wednesday, April 15, 19:22:15

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Subject: What to do Author: Elizabeth (Confused, sad ,) [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ] Date Posted: 01/25/09 9:49am I am only 15 years old, and one time i slept with a person who was 27 years older then i am, witch was completely my choice. But i happened to get pregnate with his kid, I want to keep it then again i don't. Only cause its my ex boyfriends dad. And i'm still in love with my ex, What should i do? Get an abortion or just have this child ? Please someone help me. [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]

Replies:

[> Subject: Re: What to do Author: Melanie [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 01/25/09 11:22pm Wow... That is not an easy situation to be in. The first thing I can tell you is that an abortion will not make things go back to normal. The second thing is that you need to tell someone about this. Does anyone else know you are pregnant? If so, do they know who the baby's father is? Regardless of who the father of the baby is, it isn't just "his kid", it's your child as well. How do you think an abortion would impact you personally? I know you are confused right now. That sounds like a very confusing situation to be in. But you do need to report this to someone and you probably should be seen by a doctor soon.

[> Subject: Re: What to do Author: Pat [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 01/25/09 11:28pm Hi, Elizabeth, By all means, don't get an abortion. It's dangerous, and can harm you seriously. Obviously, if this guy is so much older than you are, you know what he did was wrong. But regardless of anything else, go to a crisis pregnancy agency for help. You might want to talk to someone online without revealing what state you are in first, to see how much of a confidence they can keep for you. Go here: pregnancycenters.org You can talk to them by email or by phone. Your baby is depending on you for your protection. Please protect your baby. We love you both, and we will be praying for you. Do the right thing; follow your heart. Expect to be scared, it's normal, especially during the first trimester. But you can get the help you need, and even go live someplace else if necessary; they can help you with all of that. Keep us informed. You are always welcome here. Hugs, Pat

[> Subject: Re: What to do Author: Sharon [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 01/26/09 12:58pm Elizabeth, You need to know his having sex with you at your age constitutes statutory rape. You really need to speak with the authorities. I know you feel it was consensual, but the reality is that the law considers it rape because of the extreme age difference. The fact that the pregnancy resulted from rape, however, doesn't change the fact that the little one inside of you is fully a human being and is your child and, as Pat said, is in need of your protection. There are groups that can provide you support and resources to help you through the pregnancy and afterwards. Sharon

[> Subject: Re: What to do Author: Heather [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 01/26/09 2:22pm Hi Elizabeth, I'm sure glad you found this forum. I couldn't agree with Sharon more; I hope you'll decide to report the sexual encounter. Even if you felt it was mutual at the time, it's simply illegal for him to have had sex with you. Though there is a strong concern for the well being of the new human life inside of you, and I hope you'll side with instincts to preserve and protect his or her life, your well being is extremely important, too. You're definitely not alone, as this is unfortunately a statistic that is very common, but for your well being and counsel, and so others your age aren't similarly taken advantage of, I hope you'll report the encounter. You definitely will not be held responsible. Regarding your unplanned pregnancy, there, too, you aren't alone. Many women, including most on this board, have found that while a pregnancy may not have been planned, it can turn out more than ok. There's a lot of support and resources out there to unconditionally help women. The link Pat posted is excellent; I hope you'll explore it. Also, feel free to post here as often as you want to decompress along the way. Every person here is a valuable human being made in God's image. You can be guaranteed of a safe and respectful place here to talk. With Kindness, Heather