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Date Posted: 17:36:25 05/26/01 Sat
Author: luke
Subject: The Shadow: I quite like this, especially the second line. This has a really good soft, steady pace, rhythm. It makes me want to patronise you, though, and maybe you didn't intend that.
In reply to: tim 's message, "more rhymey poems (forgive all these poems, nut I have a backlog of about a years writing no one has ever seen)" on 14:16:05 05/25/01 Fri


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Replies:

[> Your Magnificance: I liked it the rhyming throughout most of it works really well which is quite an acomplishment. I'm not sure about the green day or is that meant to be about the jealousy becasue then is that cliched. Tissue also seems to be a bit out not becasue of the rhyming just the actual word. I like the last line, although mow i think about it the fact that it is Your Magnificance for some reason makes it sound like mocking some royalty or an animal, maybe thats just me. -- maggie, 14:38:54 05/27/01 Sun

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