This is good but it seems lacking in the sleaziness and tackiness of the character. I dont know, maybe its just me but it doesnt seem exaggerated enough. I also didnt like the girl who came to the door. The more i read over it the more awkward a situation it seems. I think the pinnacle of this is the asking the dog for a drink, it makes me hate the guy quite a bit. -- Some Let Me Make You

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Date Posted: 19:01:58 08/20/01 Mon
Author: james
Subject: This is good but it seems lacking in the sleaziness and tackiness of the character. I dont know, maybe its just me but it doesnt seem exaggerated enough. I also didnt like the girl who came to the door. The more i read over it the more awkward a situation it seems. I think the pinnacle of this is the asking the dog for a drink, it makes me hate the guy quite a bit.
In reply to: zeina 's message, "a little story. zeina goes back to prose for a bit. sorry its so damn long." on 05:53:08 08/19/01 Sun

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[> This is actually really funny particularly the beginning and there isn't anything that annoys me when I read it which is extremely unusual especially for such a long piece. I'm impressed. 'Quick paces' and 'mister officer' would be my favourite bits. -- luke, 18:44:47 08/21/01 Tue

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