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Subject: Spanking and parents'age Author: Erin [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ] Date Posted: 08:32:35 06/16/24 Sun I've been reading this site for quite a while, but hadn't posted until now. I was spanked growing up; fairly often and quite soundly, but nothing abusive. It left an impression and I've been interested in others' spankings (both m and f) for about as long as I can remember. I remember thinking that I must be the only girl over age 6 or 7 who was still being punished that way. And I absolutely felt that way by middle school. I couldn't imagine my friends' parents administering over the knee spankings. My mom was 36 when I was born, making her much older than the other moms. She was born in the warly 1950s and I wonder if that influenced her child rearing philosophy. I was an "oops baby" with three older siblings who were all spanked. These weren't just swats, but real over the knee spankings that seem old fashioned now. Does anyone else feel like their parents' age influenced their decision to spank? [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]

Replies:

[> Subject: Re: Spanking and parents'age Author: Intrigued [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 09:37:49 06/16/24 Sun Hi Erin and welcome! You used the phrase "real over the knee spankings that seem old fashioned now." Can you describe what these were like? All the details if you don't mind. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> Subject: Re: Spanking and parents'age Author: Erin [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 10:09:54 06/16/24 Sun Thanks for responding. Sometimes I'll hear people say that they were spanked, but they really mean that their parents gave them one or two swats on the seat of their clothes. I probably got that as a toddler, but I wonder how many kids are still put over mom or dad's knee and spanked on the bare bottom. That's how we got it, and by around age 9, it was usually with my mom's hairbrush. As I said, my mom grew up in the 1950s and early 60s. It seems like her generation was used to a much more formal approach to spanking. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> Subject: Re: Spanking and parents'age Author: Intrigued [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 10:23:01 06/16/24 Sun Thanks Erin. I understand that. Let me try it a different way. Could you describe that last spanking at 19 in detail from begging to end - how it felt, how hard she spanked, how long it lasted, how you reacted etc. I mean just the spanking itself. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> Subject: Re: Spanking and parents'age Author: Ross [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 09:59:11 06/16/24 Sun My parents were at an older age than "normal" when they started a family. They were raised in the 1940s and carried their philosophy of parenting into the late 70s despite the fact that we lived in a progressive area of the country and my middle school friends were mostly being raised by contemporary standards. I think I know what you mean by real old-fashioned spankings. In our house, it might as well have been the 1950s. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> Subject: Re: Spanking and parents'age Author: Rebecca [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 11:43:27 06/16/24 Sun I am 70 and was brought up in the late fifties, early sixties. It was a time when almost all parents spanked (although there was a budding anti-spanking ideology)and all the schools, public and private, paddled--and this was in liberal Western Washington. We were a large Catholic family and our stay at home mother very much believed in spanking! When I went away to college, under the influence of liberal professors and friends, I was converted to "modern" parenting-- no spank. However, once married and had children, to make a long story short, I eventually came to believe mom was lot smarter than I had given her credit for. However I was not alone. This was in the eighties, when spanking was making a comeback (James Dobson's "Dare to Discipline" and etc.). I remain pro-spanking in a radically anti-spanking age. But it has not disappeared, and I doubt it ever will --the pendulum will swing back. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> Subject: Re: Spanking and parents'age (for Rebecca) Author: Alfred22 [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 14:43:07 06/16/24 Sun How long do you think a spanking should be on one's mind? I have no issue with their being memorable. What worries me about the comeback of spanking is the return of the really scary, hard spankings. On another forum there was a brilliant writer and Gold Star Wife/widow publishing as Tessa on Voy. She has three kids, two of driving age. She totally acknowledged and even worked in the spanking industry. She even worked for Shadow Lane. She had no issue that spanking has erotic dimensions and never let that fact stop her. That is mildly interesting in itself. What interests me more is the following story that she shared. Her daughter was careless about keeping track of time and one night she realized that she had not called and was going to be quite late. To avoid the short strap that her mother was sure to spank her with, she drove fast and was stopped for speeding. The officer was good friends with the family and knew her dad before he was killed in Afghanistan. So, he escorted the daughter home and explained it all to Tessa and the younger brother. Oldest sib was away. Sister was promised the spanking she feared and the officer only reported a warning. The moral of the story that I think is most important: Spankings should not be so fearsome that kids take crazy risks to avoid them! Perhaps they could be felt a day later but just a memory two days out? This is just a ballpark estimate of an upper limit. Much less for most kids is likely to be all they need. I hope any big return of spankings is only of moderate ones, recovered from after a day or sooner afterwards. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> Subject: Re: Spanking and parents'age (for Rebecca) Author: Rebecca [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 10:28:36 06/17/24 Mon This is not really a spanking question, but about priorities. These days, with cellphones, it is always possible to call or text if a child is going to be late. Unless this is abused, curfew violations should rarely be an issue. Speeding to get home is much more serious. The last spanking I gave mine was over unsafe driving issues (it is also the reason for my last spanking as a teenager). There is never an excuse for abusive beatings, but a spanking at any age needs to be a memorable ouch. What is memorable for a seven year old is not the same as what is memorable for a seventeen year old. Did you get the impression the strapping Tessa gave her daughter was too much? Physical discipline is an effective tool used by parents since forever. That, like anything, in the wrong hands it can be abused, is no reason to dispense with it. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> Subject: Re: Spanking and parents'age (for Rebecca) Author: Alfred22 [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 07:28:05 06/18/24 Tue Tessa was a great writer and no doubt a serious journalist. Her unabashed advocacy of spanking for her three put to rest one anti-spanking argument, namely that the erotic effects of a spanking somehow undermine its behavior-influencing benefits. Her remarks to her younger (13 at the time) guy who had explicitly asked her why he got hard right before a spanking were: It is perfectly natural and don't worry it will be long gone before I finish with you. Tessa thought that she had no trouble at all distinguishing earned by naughty behavior spankings from spankings chosen for their erotic aspects. Parents who abstain from spanking lest they be accused of doing it for their own selfish personal pleasure are, according to Tessa, worrying unnecessarily. All it takes is a little commonsense to tell the difference and so she never let her time in the "industry" inhibit her using spanking for discipline. Tessa recounts her change from using a hairbrush to using the short "handstrap" that she came across and purchased at a church yardsale. It had been designed for spanking and was inexpensive so she bought it. Unlike her hairbrush applications, it did not bruise. As for the speeding spanking, I didn't mean to suggest it was excessive. I am sure it wasn't since it was with the handstrap. Tessa's daughter was just very scared of any hard spanking and she let her fear influence her driving choices. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> Subject: Re: Spanking and parents'age Author: Katie [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 12:23:47 06/17/24 Mon My parents started a family fairly young. They are currently in there mid forties. They both strongly believe in spanking! It is probably more about where you are from than how old you are. Here in the south spankings are still fairly common as far as I can tell. They for sure are in my family. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> Subject: Re: Spanking and parents'age Author: Emmie Sue [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 07:35:05 06/18/24 Tue I don't think it's that way. It seems to me that older parents or grandparents are more patient with their kids. From what I see it's the younger parents who are more disciplinarians and are more apt to give real spankings although a lot of them don't even admit it. Me for instance, my parents are older, there was a lot of years between my brothers and me and it may be just their philosophy but they never ever spanked me and it wasn't even a threat. I think that's true with most older parents. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> Subject: Re: Spanking and parents'age Author: Erin [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 04:11:47 06/19/24 Wed Hi Jenni. I was 15 the last time my mom spanked me. It had been over a year since I had been punished that way and I had really gotten my hopes up that those days were over. I had deliberately broken a rule though and that's the kind of thing that meant an automatic spanking when I was younger. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> Subject: Re: Spanking and parents'age Author: April to Erin [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 07:44:41 06/19/24 Wed Hi Erin, I am 15 and still get spanked. Not sure if I understood your last post correctly to Jenni. How old were you when you broke the rule? Was that your last spanking at age 15 or was that just recently? [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> Subject: Re: Spanking and parents'age Author: Erin [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 02:54:43 06/20/24 Thu My last was at age 15 [ Post a Reply to This Message ]