Re: Psychology of Discipline Spankings from a Parent -- Moms spanking talk

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Subject: Re: Psychology of Discipline Spankings from a Parent

Author:
Sarah
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Date Posted: 22:50:59 01/08/25 Wed
In reply to: MarkW 's message, "Psychology of Discipline Spankings from a Parent" on 13:15:41 01/07/25 Tue

Mark,

This is really an interesting post. And I agree wholeheartedly, at least when the children get to be older, spanking also becomes even more psychological. I still feel it's important to make sure the spanking hurts, and hurts a lot, even when the child is older. However, I do feel just the impact of children knowing spanking is an option for them (at their older age), and especially if others are aware they are still spanked, is just as strong. If not even more so.

As Mary made reference in her response, I touched on the aspect of embarrassment in regards to spanking in my reply to Pam's thread. A lot what I said there, applies here, as well. Where I don't go out of my way to embarrass the children, it really is inevitable when the children are older. And as I had indicated in my other post, it is a strong and effective means as part of the spanking process.

Mark, in raising my own children, as well as spanking other children under my care (grandchildren, babysitting), I have done a number of your examples. I've used a few of them quite often over the years, most notably corner time and spanking in front of others.

I usually have the child do seated corner time after a spanking so they can reflect on what they had done and what they can do next time to avoid in having to go over my lap. The corner time happens in the same room as the spanking took place.

And as for spanking in front of others, it's not something I go out of my way to do. But it's also something I don't go out of my way 'not' to do, either. If the children misbehave in the living room or a public area of the house, I have never been a Mom (and now Grandma) that takes them to another room to spank. However, if we are in an area where we are alone and they act up, then I also won't take them out to the living room or public area to spank, either. Although, unfortunately for the kids more often than not they have acted up in situations where others have been present instead of misbehaving in private. I can't tell you the amount of times I've had to spank in the living room/dining room during family/holiday gatherings or just having company in general over the years.

Mark, I wanted to comment more on your response to Mary. Where you brought up the psychological aspect of her choosing to put Scott over her lap instead of bending him over the sofa arm or the back of the chair. I can tell you, if Scott felt anything like my son Jason, he would have MUCH preferred Mary put him over the couch or his bed.

As I said in my last post, from about the time he was 12, Jason HATED that I put him over my lap every time I spanked him. He said it was "so childish". And of course it got worse for him the older he got, but I spanked him that way up until his last spanking, which he he was also nearly 20 years old.

But as I said before, one of the main reasons I continued to always spank him over my lap was because of how much he hated it. And that it reminded him he was very much still my boy, that I was in charge, and he was not too old to have his bottom bared by me and turned over Mommy's knee for a sound spanking if his behavior required it.

And I let him know that however much he wanted to think he was an adult, he wasn't. Especially when he was naughty and needed a spanking. And as always, if he didn't want Mommy to bare his bottom and turn him over her knee, then all he needed to do was behave. He was in complete control in that regards. But once he misbehaved and a spanking was needed, Mommy would be the one deciding on how it was done. Of course he never liked that answer, but he respected it.

So was there embarrassment at that age for him? Oh yes, most definitely. The same applied for my girls as well in their late teens. Although I know it was worse for my son in being bared and spanked by Mom. But as I said, embarrassment is an inevitable aspect for the children in regards to spankings when they are older, so it was something they just needed to learn to deal with. But as I mentioned before, the embarrassment is also a strong and important part of the spanking process. And to be honest, I also view it as an added benefit as it just makes the spanking all that more effective for me, as well.

Sarah

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Subject Author Date

Re: Psychology of Discipline Spankings from a Parent MarkW 12:46:51 01/09/25 Thu

Re: Psychology of Discipline Spankings from a Parent -- Sarah to Mark, 17:36:34 01/09/25 Thu

Re: Psychology of Discipline Spankings from a Parent steve52 to Sarah 18:31:07 01/10/25 Fri

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>Mark, > >This is really an interesting post. And I agree >wholeheartedly, at least when the children get to be >older, spanking also becomes even more psychological. >I still feel it's important to make sure the spanking >hurts, and hurts a lot, even when the child is older. >However, I do feel just the impact of children knowing >spanking is an option for them (at their older age), >and especially if others are aware they are still >spanked, is just as strong. If not even more so. > >As Mary made reference in her response, I touched on >the aspect of embarrassment in regards to spanking in >my reply to Pam's thread. A lot what I said there, >applies here, as well. Where I don't go out of my way >to embarrass the children, it really is inevitable >when the children are older. And as I had indicated in >my other post, it is a strong and effective means as >part of the spanking process. > >Mark, in raising my own children, as well as spanking >other children under my care (grandchildren, >babysitting), I have done a number of your examples. >I've used a few of them quite often over the years, >most notably corner time and spanking in front of >others. > >I usually have the child do seated corner time after a >spanking so they can reflect on what they had done and >what they can do next time to avoid in having to go >over my lap. The corner time happens in the same room >as the spanking took place. > >And as for spanking in front of others, it's not >something I go out of my way to do. But it's also >something I don't go out of my way 'not' to do, >either. If the children misbehave in the living room >or a public area of the house, I have never been a Mom >(and now Grandma) that takes them to another room to >spank. However, if we are in an area where we are >alone and they act up, then I also won't take them out >to the living room or public area to spank, either. >Although, unfortunately for the kids more often than >not they have acted up in situations where others have >been present instead of misbehaving in private. I >can't tell you the amount of times I've had to spank >in the living room/dining room during family/holiday >gatherings or just having company in general over the >years. > >Mark, I wanted to comment more on your response to >Mary. Where you brought up the psychological aspect of >her choosing to put Scott over her lap instead of >bending him over the sofa arm or the back of the >chair. I can tell you, if Scott felt anything like my >son Jason, he would have MUCH preferred Mary put him >over the couch or his bed. > >As I said in my last post, from about the time he was >12, Jason HATED that I put him over my lap every time >I spanked him. He said it was "so childish". And of >course it got worse for him the older he got, but I >spanked him that way up until his last spanking, which >he he was also nearly 20 years old. > >But as I said before, one of the main reasons I >continued to always spank him over my lap was because >of how much he hated it. And that it reminded him he >was very much still my boy, that I was in charge, and >he was not too old to have his bottom bared by me and >turned over Mommy's knee for a sound spanking if his >behavior required it. > >And I let him know that however much he wanted to >think he was an adult, he wasn't. Especially when he >was naughty and needed a spanking. And as always, if >he didn't want Mommy to bare his bottom and turn him >over her knee, then all he needed to do was behave. He >was in complete control in that regards. But once he >misbehaved and a spanking was needed, Mommy would be >the one deciding on how it was done. Of course he >never liked that answer, but he respected it. > >So was there embarrassment at that age for him? Oh >yes, most definitely. The same applied for my girls as >well in their late teens. Although I know it was worse >for my son in being bared and spanked by Mom. But as I >said, embarrassment is an inevitable aspect for the >children in regards to spankings when they are older, >so it was something they just needed to learn to deal >with. But as I mentioned before, the embarrassment is >also a strong and important part of the spanking >process. And to be honest, I also view it as an added >benefit as it just makes the spanking all that more >effective for me, as well. > > >Sarah
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