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Date Posted: 08:20:25 07/05/01 Thu
Author: Tim, Potter, Radar & Cleo's Dad
Author Host/IP: 206.170.184.209
Subject: Ok.....here goes my internet 'image' :-)
In reply to: Doodle's Mom 's message, "I'd like to start a string you'd not want your kids to read." on 19:32:35 07/04/01 Wed

Unfortunately....... it wasn't hard to come up with something...I'm giving you two.....both involving electrical appliances...........uh oh......

I was always doing something that put my life at risk. The two things happened somewhere between the ages of 8 and 10....in other words, I should of known better. Both incidents also included my sister, Susan, as an accomplice. She is 3 years younger than me and I was always 'encouraging' her to play the part of the 'guinea pig' with something 'new', before I would try it myself (evil grin).

First incident: I remember several times....when my mother was out of the house....of taking the iron (no steam iron in those days....but hey, they were at least electric). We'd place the iron on the kitchen counter, plug it in...giving it plenty of time to heat up (only one setting in the mid 50's). In the meantime, we would go to the refrigerator (we still called it an ice box)...take out some slices of American Cheese (for you ladies on the 'other' rogue continent....it's orange, comes in blocks and now..... individually wrapped slices....and is of the processed variety...not that great for you....but I digress. We grab a stick of butter, a couple of slices of white "Wonder Bread".......you see where this is leading???

We'd butter up the bread, put a slice of cheese between the two slices and yes........one of us (usually my sister) would hold the iron upside down and the other would press the buttered cheese sandwich onto the iron........both sides......and Voila! ...an American tradition.....the "Toasted Cheese Sandwich". I mentioned this to my mother many years later and she never realized we had put her iron through such an ordeal....I guess we must have cleaned it up pretty good (another evil grin)....can you imagine doing the next days ironing and wondering what all the grease spots on the newly laundered clothes were all about....not too mention the smell? ..he he he.

Next incident......one rainy day..again, while my mother was in the back room cleaning....my sister and I were pretty bored...school was out. We took the toaster....a kitchen table knife and headed out to the covered front porch. I had, quite by error, discovered earlier that week, that if you dug around in the toaster with the knife, while trying to encourage that piece of bread (which always got stuck)to pop back up, that you could sometimes be rewarded with a "zap" of electricity. This time, I had become more adventurous and decided to forego the bread and head straight for the 'jolt'. We took the toaster outside and plugged it in to an outlet on the porch, setting the thing on a chair. Now mind you the rain had made the cement floor of the porch wet .... despite the cover. Wanting my sister to have the experience first :-), I talked her into sticking the knife in first.....zap....she jumped with the sudden jolt and quickly let go of the knife....I thought I'd die laughing.....she was having a hard time finding the humor in it all....remember she was only about 6 or 7 and her sense of humor wasn't fully developed yet. Next it was time for big brother.....I took my place before this 'modern magical appliance.....placed my bare feet in the puddle...(the zap was stronger that way) and dove into the full experience by plunging the knife deeply into the on of the two openings....ZAP.....the strongest yet!...by this time my sister Sue had quickly caught on what it was I found so funny about the experience.

It was at this time that my big brother, Sam.....(the biggest, meanest brother ever) came through the front door.....saw what we were doing and once again beat the frap out of me.....also letting my folks know what I had talked my baby sister into doing. They obviously had a stunted sense of humor as well.

Sometimes I really wonder how I made it through childhood (not to mention my sister)...... I was....I guess....a curious sort of fellow :-)...sometime I'll have to tell you of being 'banned' at the age of five from playing with one of the neighborhood girls.....after I encouraged her...one rainy day....into helping me draw pictures of naked ladies on the garage walls (by the way, which my 'Good' older brother had shown me how to do)...her mother had set us up with crayons, coloring books, etc., in the garage to keep us occupied (and out of her hair) while she watched the Davis kid on this stormy day. I never got to play with this little girl (Ginger) for the remaining 7 years we lived there. I must admit...I didn't see what the mother was so upset about....could she apply so much meaning to the innocent wall scribblings of a 5 year old? :-) Well, I guess I DID tell you :-)

So, do you think of Uncle Tim now? he he he .\/. LOL

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