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Date Posted: 21:34:49 03/08/04 Mon
Author: Kande's Sis, hotwiring a Toyota
Subject: Already mad. Crazy as a loon.
In reply to: Rabid, considering parallel lives.... 's message, "Do you already have your own Toyota?" on 21:26:38 03/07/04 Sun

"Next!" purrs Rabid to the long line of patrons waiting patiently with gaily wrapped packages.

"Here's your gift," a surly teenager flips a small, oblong box at Rabid. Then she waves a letter under Rabid's nose. "This says I have an overdue book. But I already returned that book. YOU must have made a mistake."

"Hmmph. First things first. What's the gift?" Rabid holds the box up to her ear and shakes it. She brightens. "Is it that charm bracelet I wanted?"

"How ancient." The teen flips her hair over her shoulder and scowls in Rabid's face. "It's a switchblade. Now, about this book..."

Rabid sighs and flips the package over her shoulder without unwrapping it. At least she won't have to go shopping for KS's gift. And it's already wrapped too. She motions for the patron to follow her. Stopping in the young adult section, she points at the shelf.

"Do you see the book here?"

The teen folds her arms and pouts. "No."

"Then you still have it." She turns to head back towards the desk.

The teen shrieks "You'll hear from my mother about this!" and flounces out of the library. Rabid just shakes her head. Happens at least once a week, some teenager swears s/he's turned in a book. In a few days, Rabid will find it in the book drop.

Rabid shakes off her hands and heads back towards the desk when suddenly she stops. The mountain of packages has shrunk and there's no longer a line of patrons with gifts. There's only one patron, an old man with schizophrenia who insists daily that Rabid look up the origins of Atlantis.

"Where's my gifts?" Rabid screams and runs pell-mell towards her desk, pushing the smelly old bum out of the way. The only gift left is the switchblade the teen has left for her. All the rest have disappeared. Rabid grabs one of the book carts and the mystery is immediately solved. A gaping hole shows in the door and the heel of a Doc Marten shoe is just disappearing down it. Rabid throws herself at it, but misses.

Hair straggling down her back, Rabid staggers towards the door. Outside, KS has just blacked out part of the marquee and is putting 'Happy Birthday to KS' in gigantic letters.

Screaming, Rabid runs straight for the ladder.

-KS, wondering if Rabid was at the ALA conference last week in Seattle. Because I was there!

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Replies:

Back in her office at the klub... -- kande, 02:59:28 03/09/04 Tue
- Help me! Kande says weakly -- Kande's Sis, 07:10:24 03/09/04 Tue
  - "Happy birthday to yooooooooo!!!!!!!!" warbles kande. -- kande, wishing a present-filled day for my sister and Rabid, 02:39:32 03/10/04 Wed
    - Oh, I know what's wrong, Kande says -- Kande's Sis, 07:07:55 03/10/04 Wed
      - Rabid and KS take Kande down -- Kande's Sis, 07:08:42 03/11/04 Thu
        Everyone grumbles as they take their seats -- Kande's Sis, 09:03:18 03/13/04 Sat
        All eyes fixed themselves on the mayor -- CW, 09:28:44 03/14/04 Sun
        Surrounded by dancing dana's and the red speedo revue -- Kande's Sis, 07:06:36 03/16/04 Tue
        Outside the Klub door, Bubba eyes... -- Kande's Sis, 21:57:23 03/16/04 Tue
        Without blinking -- CW, 21:45:39 03/20/04 Sat
        Whew! -- Kande's Sis says, 07:26:40 03/21/04 Sun
        Meanwhile, back at the Klub -- CW, 20:13:01 04/02/04 Fri
        That was booby-trapped! -- Kande's Sis, 22:15:51 04/02/04 Fri
        As the Monopoly Gang -- CW, 19:35:36 04/06/04 Tue
        Because, you see... -- Kande's Sis, 15:59:26 04/09/04 Fri
        Suddenly they all get the message -- CW, 07:03:05 04/10/04 Sat
        Everyone gathers at the Klub for Easter brunch -- Kande's Sis, 09:29:39 04/11/04 Sun
        That was booby-trapped! -- Kande's Sis, 22:17:02 04/02/04 Fri