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Date Posted: 01:31:19 08/09/04 Mon
Author: Chris
Subject: How my wife and I left
In reply to: Mitch 's message, "Re: Mitch, just stop going there" on 21:09:25 08/08/04 Sun

Mitch, this is how my wife and I left UBF. It was in the early time of the reform movement in the year 2000. I had confronted Kaleb Hong, the chapter leader several times about UBF issues like the problem in Bonn, forced abortion, their dealing with the reform issues etc. and I found he didn't want to talk about it, but only brainwash and "re-educate" me. The last straw was when his wife told me during BS "you can wait for reform until we all are buried." At the same day in April, my wife and I strongly felt we should leave immediately (though originally I had planned to stay the whole year 2000 and wanted to support the reform movement from inside). We felt we couldn't survive spiritually in that corrupt environment, with twisted Bible messages on Sunday, propaganda, unwillingness to repent. At the members meeting the next Sunday after worship service, we told everybody officially that we leave because our conscience does not longer allow us to stay. We had told our "sheep" before that we would leave, and our reasons. They continued to make Bible with us and did not go to UBF any more. We became much better friends after that, they went to healthy churches; one is becoming a pastor.

I have left a lot of things in UBF, like PCs, an expensive Yamaha keyboard which I had bought and payed the half of the price, many other things. Plus all the other things that had been bought with my offering money, plus I had spent very much time and money for renovating the center building. They still use all of these things, even the pictures I made for the UBF flyers. But I never claimed back anything of this, though we started a new Bible fellowship after leaving and could have used the keyboard and other things. We were just happy that we "saved our skins" and never put our feet into the UBF center again.

I think everybody has to find his own way of leaving. If you feel strong enough, you can challenge the leadership and tell everybody frankly the reasons. But this is not a must. We all know that leaving UBF is traumatic, and this is one sign that UBF is a cult. If you feel you can't do it, then simply leave. Maybe write a letter after that. Many did it that way. Of course, these kind of letters were always ignored and never shown to the others.

Concerning marriage with a UBF Korean: Don't do it. If you do it, she will be like a iron ball chained to your ankle and hold you in the UBF prison. Even if you marry a non-Korean it can happen that she will never leave, no matter who serious and outstanding the grievances are. Today I know that it was only by the grace of God that my wife saw the things exactly like I did, we could speak openly about everything, and we could leave together.

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