Re: New thread to talk about our parenting and some questions! -- Christian Family Discipline

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Subject: Re: New thread to talk about our parenting and some questions!

Author:
Amy

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Date Posted: 14:50:19 12/22/22 Thu
In reply to: Kristina to Amy 's message, "Re: New thread to talk about our parenting and some questions!" on 07:08:37 12/22/22 Thu

>I think we think alike as well and a good place to
>vent. There have been times where before having to
>spank I was emotional and nearly in tears, had to ask
>God for his strength to do what had to be done.
>
>What do you say to them during a maintenance
>discussion to help them accept it better and help them
>build character etc. I guess, what is your procedure
>during those come to Jesus meetings?
>
>Do you have any ideas what I could say and how to word
>it with younger children?
>
>You talk about the girls learning to take discipline
>stoically, and quietly, which is wonderful that they
>don't fight the procedure, I do let mine hold a
>stuffed animal to work on training them not to reach
>back.
>
>But you may want to reassess the minimal noise part,
>Of course not screaming and howling, but encouraging
>loud crying I think is good for them, to get all those
>emotions and possible guilt out. Plus for the one
>waiting their turn, it will be a good added lesson for
>them to hear how well the spanking is working.
>
>How does a maintenance differ from a punishment
>session?
>
>Mine are younger and just learning with all of this,
>maintenance only started a year ago. I know they are
>young, but train up a child when they are young ...
>you know the verse.
>
>So when asking for discipline, they do need some
>prompting.
>"DO you have something to ask mommy?"
>"y-yes mommy"
>"go ahead sweetheart"
>"mommy please spank me"
>"Since you asked so nicely, I can do that. But where
>does mommy spank?"
>"spank me on my bottom"
>"thats right, on the BARE bottom, now please ask mommy
>to spank your bare bottom"
>"please spank my bare bottom mommy"
>
>Then I praise him and say how brave they are. Get them
>in position and say we do this because we love you,
>the bible says mommy and daddy do it this way. I ask
>if they're comfortable (as much as they can be) before
>we start
>
>I am sure the girls will be tempted to roll their eyes
>when you use the warm bottom phrase lol but of course
>sounds like they wouldn't dare risk doing that :)
>
>Do you have anything you do on Christmas as far as
>maintenance etc. I know some parents do.
>
>And thank you, but no, God bless all of you ladies for
>being so kind and sweet and talkative here! I have a
>few church mom friends who believe in discipline, but
>not many online and it can be lonely with Mark away so
>much. Maybe we could become email friends as well, Amy?
>
>You mentioned the "spanking room" at church, how often
>have you visited it with the girls? What is the room
>like?
>
>You also said "girls are spanked in front of the
>assembled attendees in much more formal sessions."
>That is rare, and can only be done in a smaller close
>knit church, am I right?
>How does that work and for what offences?

I really am flattered, Kristina, that you are asking for my suggestions. From what you have said to me so far, I am sure there is nothing I can say to help you spank them better. But. as you say, it is good to vent, share ideas and support each other. It is difficult if you are on your own for long periods or solely responsible for their discipline. But God will guide you as he is already doing.

As for their maintenance spankings, they know they will be given one after service on Sunday when we get home. So they know that they go up to their bedrooms and wait on their beds having first undressed down to their underwear. I then go and speak to each girl individually, where they admit to any occasions where they have lapsed in cleanliness or godliness. We pray about this and then each girl will tell me what sort of correction they need. Sarah the younger one needs more prompting than Emma who is a couple of years older. Then after this meeting with Jesus, I call the other girl in and the one to be spanked tells her sister how she is going to be spanked and asks me to carry it out, while she watches. Then she takes down her knickers and goes over my lap for a handspanking. (As you may have surmised, we moved to the US from the UK a number of years ago and I have never got out of the habit of calling panties 'knickers' lol)

They have learnt to take their spankings well and this is the other main point about maintenance spankings, to my mind.. Any mistakes in behaviour during their spankings means that they are given additional spanks. I think what you say to yours is lovely and is exactly the sort of conversation I would encourage from them when mine were younger. So I think you are doing just right.

A punishment session is much different in that I always decide what the punishment should be, though they still have to admit to the offence and ask to be spanked. It is harder too and can often be given with an implement. Slipper, paddle or strap (for the older girl). And, of course, naked.

Yes, they have learnt to stay in position. That's a wonderful idea to let them hold a stuffed animal for comfort and to keep hands in the right place. You have to remember that I have been giving spankings for a lot longer than you have and I had to go through all that you are going through at the beginning. It takes time and understanding what is required from the Bible helps everybody.

Yes I did use the 'warm bottom' phrase today and the older girl did just have that 'here we go again' expression flicker across her face. Emma just can't help herself sometimes and she immediately said sorry. But she should know better and that act of defiance (though minor) resulted i a strapping.

As for a maintenance spanking on Christmas Day, I am undecided. As it falls on a Sunday this year it is a difficult decision as Sunday is the day they are normally spanked. What are your thoughts about this? Would it spoil the day for all of us or do you think they would expect and want it?

They were only ever taken to the spanking room if they misbehaved in church. But the formal spankings are given once a month to each girl by the pastor or one of the elders. Particularly for single mums, he recommends that girls are spanked by a male figure regularly. They are called out to the front and disciplined in front of all the other girls who are to be spanked. Yes it is a close-knit community and I would say all the girls are spanked by their parents and in church.

Nice to read your message, Kristina and if you would like me to, I will contact you by email. God bless you.

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Replies:

Subject	Author	Date
Re: New thread to talk about our parenting and some questions!	Kristina	15:10:30 12/22/22 Thu
Re: New thread to talk about our parenting and some questions! -- Amy to Kristina, 16:05:49 12/22/22 Thu Re: New thread to talk about our parenting and some questions! -- Kristina, 16:33:12 12/22/22 Thu