Kande and Bubba are halfway to the club in the middle of the street when there is an ominous rumbling of the ground... -- X-Philes World-Shipperville

[ Show ]

Support VoyForums

[ Shrink ]

VoyForums Announcement: Programming and providing support for this service has been a labor of love since 1997. We are one of the few services online who values our users' privacy, and have never sold your information. We have even fought hard to defend your privacy in legal cases; however, we've done it with almost no financial support -- paying out of pocket to continue providing the service. Due to the issues imposed on us by advertisers, we also stopped hosting most ads on the forums many years ago. We hope you appreciate our efforts.

Show your support by donating any amount. (Note: We are still technically a for-profit company, so your contribution is not tax-deductible.) PayPal Acct: Feedback:

Donate to VoyForums (PayPal):

[ Login ] [ Contact Forum Admin ] [ Main index ] [ Post a new message ] [ Search | Check update time | Archives: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, [6], 7, 8, 9, 10 ]

[ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]

Date Posted: 19:00:18 06/01/02 Sat
Author: Rabid, passed out drunk under a Mulder clone
Subject:

Kande and Bubba are halfway to the club in the middle of the street when there is an ominous rumbling of the ground...
In reply to: Squawk-un 's message, "Loosening her razor-sharp sabre from it's scabbard" on 07:19:09 06/01/02 Sat

"ARARGGGH!" Kande arghs, "I knew it! I knew it! We are bit players in 'Tremors 4, Tastes Like Chicken'!"

"I have a contract," Bubba frantically signs as he falls to his knees.

A bright light momentarily blinds the dubious duo and the rumble increases to a deafening thunder which resolves itself into the whir of helicopter blades overhead. Kande joins Bubba in his kneeling posture and wraps her arms protectively over her head as the vehicle lands. Three dark figures exit the copter and approach.

"I SEE THEY'VE HEARD YOU WERE COMING!" a male voice bellows over the noise of the departing helicopter.

A blurry-eyed Kande peers through the stinging storm of blowing dust and the harsh bright light in an effort to learn something about these three strangers. She can sense that the middle being is female and the two flanking figures are male. Hulking, muscle-bound, mirror-shade(even though it is still dark out)wearing men in black suits. But as the dust settles and the Klub owner's eyes adjust to the dim streetlights once again, it is the woman that holds Kande's attention.

She is a lean, dark-haired, full-lipped beauty looking more like Angela Jolie than anything human(that would be the NEWCOMER...I mean...NOT, you know, KANDE, who is also lean and dark-haired but less full of lip...or...well...you know what I mean...Kande being more of the Winona Rider type of Girl Interrupted).

"Take me to your leader," the Joliesque woman commands in a creme brulee tone of voice.

Bubba snickers uncontrollably causing the two hulking men to turn their mirror-shaded glares on him. Kande elbows the little alien hard.

"Uhm...excuse my little worker...he's uhmm..." Kande, seldom at a loss for words, is at a loss for words, "he...uhm...had a little too much sun." She glances down and notices that the female newcomer is wearing shoes identical to the ones Scully was wearing during the hallway scene in Amor Fati. "Four inch Italian stacked heels," she reverantly sighs in a true non-sequiter. Bubba give her the elbow and signs a quick apology.

"Please excuse my human companion your Grace," the alien signs, "she isn't used to visitors from above. If it pleases would your bodyguards wish to escort you to our humble shelter so that we may contact our leader. I am sure that she will wish to come immediately to worship at your oversized and oddly formed feet."

"Are you sure you translated that correctly?" Hulk #1 snaps as Hulk #2 shrinks back in fear from the Joliesque One's narrow-eyed gaze. Hulk #2 gives the translator a brisk bang with his fist as if the poor machinery is at fault.

"Uhm, excuse me?" Kande interjects as she hops to her feet, "If you expect me to call Mayor Kenamom at this hour and risk a hefty "waking up the Mayor" tax on top of a "thinking I have a good reason" tax then you had better give me a good reason."

All three of the newcomers turn to stare at the klub owner as if she was the lunch special and had just objected to being served with a parsley garnish. Bubba frantically signed for Kande's attention while waving one of the larger denominations of Shipperville currancy.

"What IS the matter with you, Bubba," Kande began and then broke off, "and HEY! Where did you get that fifty? I don't pay you that much in a month and okay...okay...I am looking at it...so it's a fifty...and you have it and...WHAT? It has something to do with these goons and the...oh...yeah, the picture...of the Fox County Manager...yeah, she's a babe and...OH...OH," Kande does a double take comparing the Joliesque Woman to her likeness on the fifty dollar bill. "OH MY Flippin' GOD...It's her!" Kande yelps, "OH...OH...ARRRAAGGGHHH! BUBBA! QUICK! GET THE MAYOR ON THE PHONE!"

The newcomers watch the small cloud of dust that is all Kande and Bubba have left behind as they scamper at top speed for the Klub to phone Mayor Kenamom with the tragic news that she has been outranked by the EVIL FOX network(aka Shipperville's County Council) they have sent a suit to town(no doubt to explain the "new paradigm" that will, when it becomes the "guiding force of Shipperville", lead to a "greater buy in from all stakeholders" and of course cost FOX a lot less money).

Hulk #1 holds out his hand for the translator. Hulk #2 hands it over and #1 clicks it into his briefcase. Then all three of the newcomers stalk toward the Klub, the Joliesque One's high heels making tiny impact craters in the dust.

Rabid/Raeann
shuddering to think what all of this means for the Socialist uprising and the future of Shipperville itself!

[ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]

Replies:

As Whats-her-name tries to leave the lab -- kenamom,slapping off the Mulder clones passes, 08:56:59 06/03/02 Mon
- KS pulls the cushion out of the seat of her pants -- No-name, 20:33:23 06/03/02 Mon
  - KS whips around to see one of the Peacock boys pointing at her. -- kande, 03:13:13 06/04/02 Tue
    - One of the SMH clones peeks in on KS... -- The oh-so-clever one, 19:43:42 06/04/02 Tue
      - Kenamom notices her full wastebasket -- kenamom, 12:57:35 06/05/02 Wed
        and Kande bursts into song! -- Slimey (not the worm from Sesame Street), 21:11:58 06/05/02 Wed
        "ARG" slimy yells as she falls (again) to the ground with a thud -- kenamom, shaking out her wrists, 20:40:39 06/06/02 Thu
        "Hey you two" -- CW, 20:27:01 06/07/02 Fri
        The door of the klub bursts open -- The Cloned One, 07:25:38 06/08/02 Sat
        KM *accidently* trips over KS's extended foot -- The innocent one, 07:41:17 06/08/02 Sat
        CW coshes Kande over the head... -- The Literary One, 19:12:35 06/08/02 Sat
        KS and the Mayor look at each other in horror -- For brevity's sake...KS, 22:00:12 06/09/02 Sun