Gasp! gasps all the Shippervillians -- X-Philes World-Shipperville

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Date Posted: 19:50:27 12/13/07 Thu
Author: Kande's Sis, gasping
Subject: Gasp! gasps all the Shippervillians
In reply to: kenamom - becoming endeered with the story....hehehehe 's message, "HAHAHAHA.....with venison.....HAHAHAHA....too funny!" on 20:32:05 12/11/07 Tue

The Mayor clutches her sparkly silver clutch to her throat. "Not the Holy Bleep signal!" She then swoons to the floor in a tidy cluster of limbs, skirt tugged discreetly over her rounded knees.

"Hot dog!" screeches KS, twirling a couple of revolvers, and in her excitement jettisoning a knife across the bar, giving a tourist a bald swathe across his skull. "I've waited all my life for a Holy Bleep."

Stardoe looks at her sceptically as she checks the pulse of the sleeping Rabid. "You don't even know what it is. And by the way...you used too much of the chloroform. You could have put a rhinocerous to sleep with this."

KS struts over to Rabid and pushes at her with the toe of her boot. "Rats. I just bet she hasn't finished shopping yet, either."

Behind them, Kande is running around in a dither. "OhMYGod! OhMyGod! The Holy Bleep! Batten the hatches! Everyone down into the cellar!" She takes her apron and starts shooing patrons down the dark steps behind the stage. "Single file! No pushing! AND QUIT THAT SMOOCHING!"

Still glaring, Kande slams the door behind the last tourist. "Now, who wants my special eggnog?"

Unnoticed, Bubba has slipped outside to watch the sky. Sure enough, the Holy Bleep signal is a pulsing red light to the left of the Milky Way. He sighs. He should get into his ship and leave now, tonight, before the Cylons get here and make everyone into pod people. He turns to leave and looks into the bar. There's the ever-gorgeous and dangerous KS stalking around the tables, every once in awhile pretending to gouge out someone's eye. The Mayor has one eye open, looking to see if anyone took the opportunity during her swoon to slip one of her presents beneath the tree. Rabid is twitching and drooling in her sleep, a puddle of saliva plastering her hair to one cheek. Kande is tearing down every sprig of mistletoe he had snuck in the bar. Stardoe is consulting her Bleep tracking system. They are so vulnerable, so dear, he can't possibly leave them to such a dreadful fate. Can he?

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Replies:

"Why, yes! Yes, he can!" -- Rae, 18:35:54 12/15/07 Sat
- As he sails past Mars.... -- Stardoe, 19:09:50 12/15/07 Sat
  - MERRY CHRISTMAS STARDOE!!!...lets do chat over the holidays. (NT) -- KM, challanging anyone to work the two different posts, 19:36:29 12/15/07 Sat
- The Bleepin signal gets bleepin louder -- kenamom, searching the sky - fearful of raindeer droppings, 19:15:52 12/15/07 Sat
  - As everyone looks skyward... -- kande, 02:36:21 12/19/07 Wed
    - Wisconsin! -- Kande's Sis, 05:05:05 12/20/07 Thu
      - Something is seen overhead -- Kande's Sis, 18:54:20 12/24/07 Mon
        "Actually..." begins kande. -- kande, 12:42:15 12/26/07 Wed
        "Oh dear!" says Stardoe -- Kande's Sis, 04:53:53 12/27/07 Thu
        Wait, what am I saying? Kande says. -- Kande's Sis, 12:25:15 12/27/07 Thu
        "All right, that's enough." -- kande, 12:28:13 12/27/07 Thu
        KS is almost back to normal -- Kande's Sis, 12:49:39 12/27/07 Thu
        As Kande begins to speak... -- Stardoe, 05:45:04 12/31/07 Mon
        KS falls for the diversion -- kenamom, 08:19:29 12/31/07 Mon
        Nice, very nice -- Kande's Sis, 14:52:41 12/31/07 Mon
        Meet Gary the drunk car salesman.... -- KM, happy 2007 is coming to an end...., 18:44:21 12/31/07 Mon
        OK KS, the car's loaded -- Kande's Sis, 12:24:20 01/04/08 Fri
        While the Mayor ponders the mystery -- Kande's Sis, 05:08:41 01/09/08 Wed