| Subject: Re: The Script begins |
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Date Posted: 16:47:38 07/01/02 Mon
In reply to:
's message, "Re: The Script begins" on 01:30:15 06/28/02 Fri
>>Greg and Tim sit in the car in a completely different
>>setting. It's only about 10 minutes after they left
>>the parking lot.
>>
>>Greg (frustrated)
>>Why don't you just get out of my car.
>>
>>Tim
>>Why don't you learn how to take some constructive
>>criticism.
>>
>>greg and time now sit in a diner. They've already
>>eaten. Tim is holding the bill.
>>
>>Waitress
>>Sir, I don't...
>>
>>Tim
>>Well, I don't see how you could expect me to pay for
>>it. (to greg)They expect me to pay for burnt eggs.
>>
>>Waitress
>>Sir, if you had told me that your eggs were burnt i
>>could have...
>>
>>Tim
>>That's not my responsibility. You're supposed to
>>notice these things.
>>
>>Greg (puling out his credit card)
>>You ate your whole meal. We're paying for it.
>>
>>Tim
>>Put it away.
>>
>>Uncomfortable silence.
>>
>>Outside of the diner. Greg's in the car. Tim stands
>>a short distance away with his arms crossed. they
>>speak through the passenger side window.
>>
>>Greg
>>Get in the car
>>
>>Tim
>>No
>>
>>Greg
>>Grow up.
>>
>>Tim
>>I already did. why don't you try it.
>>
>>Greg
>>Fine...walk
>>
>>Tim
>>GODDAMNIT! I WILL NOT! WHY DON'T YOU UNLOCK THE DOOR
>>AND LET ME IN!
>>
>>Greg
>>DON'T TURN THIS AROUND ON ME! IT'S UNLOCKED! IT'S
>>BEEN UNLOCKED! IT WAS NEVER LOCKED! YOU KNOW THAT!
>>GET IN THE CAR!
>
>Int. Office - Day
>
>We pull back and see the previous scene playing out on
>a video monitor in a meeting room-type-place.
>
>A man named PAUL stands by the monitor watching as
>Greg gets out of the car and he and Tim begin to
>fight, eventually rolling on the ground.
>
>TIM (on tape)
>Ahhh! There's broken glass here.
>
>GREG
>Fuck you ass face!
>
>We continue to pull back and now we see a woman NANCY
>watching this all unfold.
>
>NANCY
>You're kidding me.
>
>PAUL
>We've been doing surveillance for a few days. There's
>quite a lot of this.
>
>NANCY
>They just fight like this?
>
>PAUL
>Most of the time. It seems the only time they're not
>fighting is when they're eating. Of course even then
>it's not always the case.
>
>Nancy watches the tape. There is a cut and we see the
>two of them eating out of some instant noodle soup
>cups. They both don't look at each other and eat with
>an intensity usually reserved for zealots worshipping
>at the alter of their god.
>
>Tim suddenly looks over at Greg and swipes at his
>noodle cup like a jealous dog. Greg utters a strange
>barking sob at Tim.
>
>NANCY
>Horrible.
>
>PAUL
>It's what you wanted.
>
>NANCY
>I just can't believe that they actually exist...
>
>PAUL
>(points to Tim)
>I think this one's the smart one.
>
>NANCY
>Obviously. Well. What are we waiting for, let's
>bring them in.
>
>PAUL
>We may have difficulty in doing that.
>
>NANCY
>Why?
>
>PAUL
>Here.
>
>He clicks a button on a remote. We go back into the
>monitor and watch the next scene unfold "live"
>
>EXT. APARTMENT COMPLEX - DAY
>
>Greg and Tim are sitting by the car with candy bars in
>their hands.
>
>There are a multitude of candy bar wrappers strewn
>about on the ground. Tim finishes his candy bar and
>drops the wrapper on the ground.
>
>TIM
>Fifty-nine! One more and you pay up!
>
>He takes a candy bar sitting next to him and begins to
>unwrap it.
>
>Greg has three bars sitting next to him.
>
>He eats faster.
>
>A nice looking sports car pulls up in front of them.
>
>JESUS, a young hispanic man gets out of the car.
>
>Tim pauses in mid-bite.
>
>Greg continues eating.
>
>JESUS
>Hey guys.
>
>Tim looks over at Greg and starts to eat his candy bar.
>
>JESUS
>Eating candy huh?
>
>They both look up at Jesus but neither responds.
>
>JESUS
>How would you guys like to make some money?
>
>Still no response.
>
>JESUS
>I've got a friend who wants to pay you some money to
>do a job.
>
>Tim is gobbling his candy bar. Suddenly he gets a
>sick look on his face. He leans over and vomits.
>
>Greg sees this, is encouraged.
>
>JESUS
>Guys...
>
>Greg is eating faster now.
>
>Tim tries to bite again. He sees Greg throw one
>wrapper on the ground and pick up the next. Tim
>shudders as he swallows another bit of candy.
>
>TIM
>Oh no you don't!
>
>Tim vomits on Greg.
>
>Greg stares down at his soiled clothes.
>
>GREG
>You sick fuck! That's at least four candies right
>there.
>
>TIM
>Huh?
>
>GREG
>You have to keep 'em down.
>
>TIM
>Oh bullshit.
>
>GREG
>You do.
>
>TIM
>I'll keep your face down in the dirt, you bastard.
>
>Tim finishes his candy in three quick bites.
>
>TIM
>There I win.
>
>GREG
>No way. Throwing up is forfeit.
>
>JESUS
>Hey guys, look, there's candy in the car.
>
>TIM
>(to Jesus)
>Excuse me, but shut the fuck up while we sort this
>shit out, okay?
>
>INT. OFFICE - DAY
>Back out from the tape now and onto Nancy and Paul.
>
>The two can be heard wrestling and throwing up.
>
>Nancy watches, just disgusted.
>
>PAUL
>He finally left when the smell was unbearable.
>
>NANCY
>Well maybe you have to pick your moments with these
>guys.
>
>PAUL
>We thought when they were eating would be the best
>time, but...
>
>NANCY
>Well you give it a shot, Paul. Get 'em in here. If
>we can get them on this job then that'll give us
>plenty of distractions for Operation B.
>
>PAUL
>Yes ma'am. I'll get them in here.
>
>Back on the monitor we see Tim shoving a candy bar in
>Greg's mouth.
>
>TIM
>Sixty! Go go go! Down down down! SIX-TEE, UH HUH,
>SIX-TEE!
At the laundromat greg and tim wear pajamas. Tim is reading a badly battered Physics book and is clearly confused. Greg is eating some candy he finds sickening. He keeps eating it anyway. Tim closes his book and slams it on the ground. Greg chokes and nearly vomits. The washing machine stops.
Tim
Check it out
Greg walks over, lifts the lid on the washing machine and takes a sniff. He chokes and nearly vomits.
Greg
not yet. I'm out of quarters.
Tim
Let me try
Tim smells the clothes
Tim
Holy shit that stinks. We need some more quarters fast.
Greg
I'm out of quarters
Tim
Use the change machine
Greg reaches into the washer, pulls out his pants and pulls his wallet from his back pocket. Tim stares on the verge of disbelief. Greg pulls out a ball of wet money that falls apart as he tries to straighten it out on the surface of the next washing machine.
Tim (points at the money)
There's no way you're that fucking stupid
Greg
It's alright. Hand me that tape (points at the washer)
Greg, after waiting a few seconds for tim to do it, pulls a roll of duct tape from the washer and starts wrapping the tape around the ball of wet money.
Greg (smugly)
I come prepared. Hand me those scissors.
Tim stares at greg.
Greg
The scissors
Tim reaches in and grabs out a pair of scissors and hands it to Greg. Tim struggles with the tape and scissors as greg pulls a shirt out of the washer. Its been torn badly by the scissors. greg keeps struggling.
Greg
Hand me that shirt
Tim
Fucking forget it, assface
Tim throws the wet shirt at greg's face
Tim walks toward the laundromat exit.
Greg
Wait! Just a few seconds. I'm almost done
Tim turns around to scream (while pointing at greg)
STUPID SHIT!
Outside of the laundromat. Tim exits and is walking down the street. greg runs out.
Greg
Look, I fixed it
Greg lifts his right hand, holding up a ball of tape with some wet money hanging out
Tim
What about our clothes, stupid shit? You're dumb-ass scissors ruined everything.
Greg, shocked, drops the money and pulls the scissors out of his pajama pants.
Greg
These scissors weren't so dumb-ass when you couldn't get that bag of chips open. And what about when you were stuck in that...
Tim (knocks the scissors from greg's hand)
Fuck the scissors! What about our clothes?
greg, with his left hand, holds up a bigger ball of tape with a sleeve hanging out of it.
Tim
AAAAAHHHHH!
Tim grabs Greg and they fall to the ground wrestling. Their faces are hidden in the struggle. We see someone's vomit shoot out of their ball of violent eroticism.
Jesus (off-camera)
Need some new clothes, guys?
They both look up at Jesus but they continue to fight.
Tim (Ina strained tone)
Can't you see that we're busy?
Greg (Painfully)
Are you blind?
Jesus
wow. Clothes. Did you hear me? New clothes. You need clothes. I'll get you some if you just...
Tim (with greg in a headlock)
We don't have time for you. Can't you see that?
Greg (swinging at Tim's face)
Would you both shut up. I need to concentrate.
Jesus Sighs. Greg succeeds and finally punches tim in the face. Tim loses his grip as he vomits on Greg.
Greg
You sick fuck!
Jesus
wow. GUYS! Listen to me! Stop Fighting and listen to me!
They keep fighting
Jesus
I will buy you new clothes!...and Candy!...and anything you want! Please...
Tim and Greg (in unison)
Anything?
Jesus
Yes, anything
Tim and Greg (in unison)
Fuck you!
Jesus, flustered, tries to break up their fighting
Jesus (Struggling)
Alright, guys, listen to me. Stop fighting.
Greg vomits
Jesus
Oh shit
Tim
What do you want from us?
Jesus (struggling and choking)
I want to buy you some new clothes
Greg
You said candy, fuckface
Jesus
That too
Tim
Why do you want to buy us new clothes?
Jesus
Stop fighting me and I'll tell...
Before Jesus can finish that sentence, greg rabbit punches jesus' nutbag two or three times. Jesus starts to vomit and cry. The struggle stops. They all lay there in a pile.
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